u/T2RX6

Hello everyone. I am a 44M (45 next week) male who recently has been told by his wife of 11 years that he is the source of all her problems. She started talking to someone on the Internet about 6 months ago who has slowly destroyed my relationship from the inside.

Today she finally said that she wants to split. It's been 6 months of me fighting for my marriage, for myself, my wife, my kids.

I am surprisingly ok with her wanting to split. It's really been mentally abusive for me over the past 6 months while I tried to be the best husband and dad I could be. While I tried to prove that I have value and what we have was good. Regardless I cannot make someone feel and cannot make them stay.

I am a good man. I am a faithful man. I loved my wife and love my kids.

So now I am ok with her decision but scared going into the future. I worry as a middle aged man who isn't the most physically fit, I am balding (but shaved my head), I have 2 kids and got the snip so I cannot make anymore kids. At this point this is divorce #2 for me (the first I was much younger but frankly I didn't think I would be divorced once let alone twice).

How do I move forward? How do I get over the feeling of being unlovable? I have had 3 major relationships in my life. One from highschool to college that ended badly, an ex wife that left me because she wanted to experience life on her own, and now this one that has fallen for another man and just has beaten me down for 6 months telling me how awful a partner I am.

What tips do you have that can help me gain my self confidence back? What type of person should I be looking for? How do I (eventually) manage dating with two children? I don't have friends or family local to me that can help me here. How do I know when it's right to introduce someone to my kids?

I truly thought I found my person to grow old with that loved me for me and 14 total years together I was wrong. I am so scared if I make this mistake again I will be 60.. I don't want to be wrong again. Any advice I can take forward?

Thank you.

My Pixel 10 pro is running Android 16 and working just fine.

My wife isn't home right now but she usually updates immediately when she gets an update notification so she MIGHT have android 17 installed. Her phone gets stuck in a loop of starting up and then restarting. IF you are quick you can sometimes get to where you need to clear the user data in the google app and the google play store and it'll work for a little bit, but a handful of hours later on it'll go back into it's rebooting loop issue. Is anyone else having this issue?

Are we able to roll back to A16 if she upgraded to A17? If so how?