u/Temperature596

I've been diagnosed recently with ASD lvl 1 and realised I've been masking my whole life (I'm 36 male). In a previous post, I mentioned being the people-pleaser type and when I reduce masking and become more honest surprisingly my social interactions improve. People seem to like this version of me better. I say inappropriate things sometimes, but my friends are fine with myself not being perfect because they are not perfect themselves. In fact, when I people pleased I tried too hard sometimes which was objectively worse.

But now I'm facing another challenge: in certain situations, not masking means disappearing. That is, I have no reaction whatsoever. I don't feel like talking or responding. I just don't exist unless the social interaction involves a topic I'm actually interested in. I've even thought that maybe I don't even have a personality and don't really know who I am. Does anyone relate to this?

I've recently been diagnosed with ASD Lvl 1 and I am struggling accepting it. To give you some background, I do not exhibit glaring struggles with implicit language and sensory issues. I was diagnosed mainly based on social difficulties, rigidity and need for patterns, and difficulties regulating my own emotions (this last one was actually the most clinically significant finding in my testing). Also, my strong sense of justice -- if someone does something that hurts me, I shut down and go as far as not being able to look at their eyes until they sincerely apologise.

Since the diagnosis, I've been thinking about certain personality traits, such as being a people pleaser, too nice and kind since a young age, and if/how they relate to the overall picture. I've been wondering if I haven't been masking all this time without being aware.

I've been able to reduce doing this after diagnosis, which, surprisingly, has helped in some social settings (turns out my true self is more interesting than the super nice persona), but sometimes it's so ingrained that I switch back to doing this.

Has anyone experienced this? Is it consistent with ASD level 1? It also seems contradictory to me: shouldn't masking actually help in social situations, as I'd be hiding traits that are not neurotypical?

Hi everyone,

I (35M) recently underwent a neuropsychological evaluation to get to the root of some lifelong struggles, and I just received the final report. The diagnostic impression is Autism Spectrum Disorder Level 1.

To be honest, I'm experiencing imposter syndrome right now and trying to process it all. I wanted to summarize the findings here and ask the community: given these specific scores and patterns, is there any chance the evaluator got this wrong? Could this profile be explained by something else, like severe social anxiety?

Here is a breakdown of what the evaluation found:

General Intelligence range (80th percentile) with a processing speed/reaction time classified as Superior.

Attention: Tested across concentrated, alternated, and divided attention, scoring up to the 90th percentile. No objective attention deficits were found.

Memory: Recognition memory is fully preserved and above average (75th percentile).

Language: The report notes early childhood language development and highly clear, functional communication skills in adulthood.

Social Responsiveness Scale (SRS-2): my Social Perception and Social Cognition scores were completely normal. However, my Social Motivation and Communication scores fell into the clinically moderate range. The psychologist noted this is a classic "masking" profile, intellectually understanding social dynamics perfectly, but finding the actual execution and reciprocity deeply unnatural and exhausting.

Executive Function (BDEFS): Showed mild-to-moderate difficulties with time management and daily organization, but my Emotional Regulation score was flagged as almost deficient / 85th percentile.

Subjective Symptoms: On the ASRS-18, I reported high internal feelings of inattention, procrastination, and mental overload, even though the objective attention tests were excellent.

Mental Health Context: The evaluation flagged mild anxiety, mild depression, and elevated current stress. The evaluator concluded these emotional symptoms are secondary, a result of chronic stress from navigating life with an undiagnosed neurodivergence rather than the root cause.

The report concludes that my profile perfectly aligns with ASD Level 1 because it unifies my lifelong history of social isolation, hyper-monitoring my behavior, and executive friction, while ruling out intellectual or basic cognitive deficits.

Because my raw cognitive metrics are good and I can communicate well, a part of my brain keeps telling me, "maybe you're just socially awkward, anxious, a little lazy." I'm not aware of any sensory issues despite things like not enjoying some spaces where the music bothers me, which I think happens with neurotypicals too. Also, I don't recall having the problems I have today as a child (at least not until I was 8 or 9).

For those who are diagnosed or work in this field: how likely is a specialist psychiatrist to disagree with a comprehensive neuropsych evaluation like this?

Appreciate any insights or shared experiences. I am still processing this.