I can’t tell if my life is normal or if I genuinely need a life change
I (22F) feel really conflicted about the life I’ve built. I know I’m doing well for my age. I graduated college, I work remotely in a stable job, and I also own/manage a horse property and have responsibilities that most people my age definitely don’t have yet. A lot of people including my parents look at my life and think I should feel grateful and happy.
The problem is that I feel extremely isolated, and I can’t tell if this is just a normal phase or if I’m genuinely living in an environment that isn’t a good fit for me anymore.
My day-to-day life is very independent. I work remotely, spend a lot of time training horses and juggling farm responsibilities, and a lot of my routine is just me alone doing what needs to get done. There aren’t many opportunities in my normal routine to just exist around other people my age at all.
Nothing in my life is technically “wrong,” but I feel emotionally under-stimulated. I miss feeling connected to people. I miss spontaneity. I miss having a social life that doesn’t require planning every interaction days in advance. I miss feeling like life is happening around me instead of me just maintaining responsibilities.
I’m also not someone who wants to completely throw away stability and party all the time. I like having structure, goals, routines, fitness, responsibilities, etc, but I also want to be able to go out and have a social outlet sometimes. I’m not looking to escape adulthood. I just want a version of adulthood that feels more alive and connected than this.
This issue has also tied into my current relationships. If someone doesn’t text back or I don’t hear from friends for a few days, it affects me more than I think it should, since I have no other interactions to think about.
I guess I just want advice on if this is normal or if I should consider a slight lifestyle change?
I’ve considered trying a different city eventually, but I need a few more months to make the farm side of my responsibilities more self sufficient.
I feel like moving is dramatic but right now it’s the only idea that doesn’t make me feel hopeless. Has anyone else experienced something similar?