u/That_Bee_592

I'm not sure I need advice, just an outlet. Parent's apathy is causing me to ask why we're doing any of this. They won't go outside for fresh air, won't look at animals or birds that come into the yard. Probably awake 6 hours a day. The one behavior that just kills me is how they close the blinds on the sunset. No interest in watching the sunset or moon. I guess they like their pet. but half the time they won't look up when it does something cute and I'm increasingly taking on more play time and feeding.

I feel like it's taking 3 adults full time and a small army of doctors to keep someone alive that just wants to play on their phone 4 hours a day. They want specialist appointments, then don't do any of the exercises or meds they suggest.

I'm just depressed and asking what this investment is even for at this point. I'm fighting 24/7 for someone who's completely checked out of life.

Y'all, parent has a stomach bug and won't stay put. They're touching every furniture item instead of the walker, using the kitchen tap instead of the bathroom, walking around the dining area with no pants. Whatever surface their poopy fingers shouldn't be on, they've found.

I'm about to explode in OCD. Send me bleach I can't do this.

At no point in my life did I ever say I was cut out for nursing.

Parent is still on it about how I need to find a high paying job, immediately. Today they got on to how I should become a doctor, just an unhinged understanding of how that is a 12 year ask with probably $200k in debt, and I'm already in my late 40s. With no interest in medical. They just recently went to the doctor (with a head injury) and decide That's Probably A Job.

I keep trying to not start the conversation, redirect. I know they're trying to start drama out of personal depression, but it's making my home life insufferable. My mental health is awful.

The tldr is family were hoarders. House is in squalor. Since I've moved back I've been making a strong push to fully remodel the worst rooms.

Remodel is half finished, capable elderly spouse keeps stalling. Just not texting them back. We're getting there but it's still a mess.

Dementia parent has been throwing abusive rage tantrums at me anytime I'm "caught" cleaning. They fell trying to unload the dishwasher after repeatedly telling me I'm not allowed because I do it wrong. Their kitchen has mice and they also threw a tantrum when I pointed out that was unacceptable.

Now they have guests and want a full top to bottom house clean in one day. It would take me a calendar year, multiple dumpsters and probably 6 separate contractors and exterminators to actually clean this property.

They're sulking I said no. (I actually clean a little every time they leave. I already dusted this week. They don't notice).

"Today I'm going to clean the house, so I'll tell you what to do and you'll help." "I'll see what I can do but that's probably a no"

They won't follow any of my routines, won't let me do it all for them. Frankly it's upsetting that I'm expecting to live in filth but their guests aren't (including golden child siblings).

Today's new jumpscare was "horror movie screaming night terrors". They remember nothing. They're happily chatting with their snacks.

My nervous system is never going to recover from this year.

Good morning friends. I'm losing it again. Parent has two full time competent adult drivers here 24/7. Apparently they took a fall, quietly got back up, waited a full 18 hours before telling anyone. Then today at breakfast started making confused phone calls to out of state family asking what to do.

I'm standing there car keys and insurance network in hand trying to get them out the door, family got woken up in a panic with what outwardly sounded like a confused cry for help.

How the fck am I supposed to deal with this?! "I don't want to worry you. I don't want you to feel like you're taking care of me."

I moved into their house to take care of them, and they're just lying about things happening right under my face. It's making me look like an irresponsible piece of shit too. I'm literally fully dressed trying to drag them to the ER and they're calling random aunties for help.

This week they started in on paranoid auditory hallucinations. They're accusing me of talking to their neighbor - enemy.

I've been trying to play this off as "did you hear me watching YouTube? I was watching some little comedy reels on YouTube?"

Now they're doing it when I'm out walking. (Like no, I was a full two miles away, I've never met your neighbors, no one is outside chatting about you.)

I don't need help, I'm just exhausted having to play along with this weirdness. Every day is getting further and further from reality. I just want a normal healthy life back.

Well, everything I witnessed the first months here seems to have been a slow resolving UTI, and now they're slightly better. More coherent . More energy.

But just enough to become emotionally abusive, and to get into the phone and cancel all their doctor appointments without asking their driver, before I was awake.

I am once again asking the universe....