u/The_Robins_Nest

At the start of 2021, I clocked in at around 260 lbs and honestly, I don’t even think that was my heaviest. Hard to say, I avoided the scale like my life depended on it (the irony is not lost on me, promise.) This morning, I finally tipped my way out of the 190s. 189 lbs!

I’ve been big my entire life. Literally. I was a 10 lb baby. I was always aware of how big I was as a kid and as a teen and as an early adult, but it’s hard to put any actual numbers in place that whole time since, as previously mentioned, scales were the enemy. I could lie to myself all I wanted, but the numbers wouldn’t. So instead I stayed away from the scale and lied in bed, ordered extra large pizzas for dinner, housed Ben and Jerry’s pints as a midnight snack. And then I’d catch myself in the mirror, suck in my gut as far as it’d go, and say “well sure I’m fat, but at least I’m not *that* bad, right?”

Copy that behavior for over a decade and soon enough, I was *that* bad. Picked up super unhealthy eating habits in college resulting in an addiction to fast food (ordering usually at least twice a day) as well as my first real run in with depression that lingered with me into my early 20s. By the time I was 23, my BMI was a conservative 37 with nowhere to go but up. I had basically become a bear, sleeping all day and night, only coming out to eat until it became painful only to lie back down until I fell asleep again. I have no fond memories of my early 20s. Tbh, I barely have any at all.

I tried a few diets here and there but nothing ever stuck. I’d feel that sudden ping of determination at 2 am, try to do a few pushups and throw in the towel. I’d see endless articles on how to “lose x lbs in y months!” And every time, I’d find myself back where I had always been within a week tops. I just didn’t have the discipline for these big, life altering changes. Couldn’t do it. I was, and still am, too stubborn for that.

But what about little changes? I could probably do that.

Slowly, over the course of years, I’d start changing things here and there. Super small things, like “im gonna go walk outside for at least 5 minutes a day” or “i can drink as much pop as I want, but im gonna drink a glass of water first”. Little things that didn’t *feel* like changes, really. I’d never be able to completely cut out sweets like some people, but could I agree not to keep them in my room? Sure, I could do that.

Let me tell you, those changes add up *fast*. When I started to feel a little lighter, I bought my first scale and lost 30 lbs after the first year. As time went on, changes would grow a bit at a time, from “water before pop” to “water before diet pop” or “5 minutes outside” to “2500 steps”. And by doing things at a snails pace, I never really felt like I was dieting or exercising or doing anything substantial to lose weight. But I *was* losing weight!

Cut to today, and those little changes I started over 5 years ago have morphed into a lifestyle that I never could’ve dreamed of back then. Calorie counting, OMAD/ intermittent fasting, 10k steps a day, jogging 2/3 times a week. Sure, it took a long time to get here, and I’m not done yet. I still have another 20 lbs to go before I hit my goal, and I’m sure I’ll add more changes along the way. But I’ve made it this far!

So, let me be a representative for taking things slow. If it takes you 6 months to lose 5 lbs, great job! If you can’t run a mile but decide you *can* walk around the block, hell yeah! It might not feel as gratifying as losing the weight fast, but slow and steady wins the race, after all. Or maybe, don’t even worry about winning the race in the first place. You’ll cross the finish line when you get there.