u/ThrowawayAccLmaoVent

I have had a concussion from a seizure back since June of 24, I just came back to school this Monday and I realize I wetted on myself at school. I was thought I had gotten my period but I was wearing grey pants and didn’t notice any thing. Then the odor, it wasn’t strong but I realize I had wet myself. It reminded me of when I first wet myself 2 days after my first sezuire I’ve been 53 days free till today.

Is it because the stress I put on myself during school? My handwriting has also been getting worst so has my writing. If you look at my spelling the worlds are all gunbled up and messy.

Should I be concerned

I came home exhausted from school, like I fell asleep so fast and it was those deep sleeps. I woke up feeling more exhausted than I ever was. Sleeping just felt so peaceful. Anyways, I was very angry and bitter towards everyone, also couldn’t focus at all because these two girls next to me kept on talking. My school is one of those pouches school which makes you put your phone in a pouch so I couldn’t put on my noise cancellation AirPods like i usually would. I didn’t have a crying session today just pure utter exhaustion. Also today made me realized how bad my memory has gotten, I had struggled to remember my schedule (which was on my phone) and stuttered all day. I would be mid sentence and forget what I was talking about. I don’t think my teachers really know about my eplisey or concussion. I only have my seizure action plan and that’s about it. I’ll bring up everything to my neurologist in my next appointment (I don’t know when my next appointment is at since they had moved my previous one up to tell me my diagnosis) also my stupid memory had made me forget my medication (okay this was also my fault I was running late no judging >:/ lol im kidding) I was struggling really hard in the morning with withdrawal symptoms and I suffered with a headache all day.

Also a little side note something that had upset me today was my friend talking about “shush your making my headache hurt” girl I have a concussion and my head is POUNDING and you don’t see me telling everyone else to shut up, luckily I didn’t take my anger out on her or anything. It’s probably me being bitter and angry towards everyone I really do hope my anger doesn’t make me say stuff that hurts people (im on keppra) just wanted to vent it out and ask for how to deal with the bitterness, exhaustion of this all. I don’t know how to come and ask my mom to ask the school for more help since im obviously struggling to keep up, I just need my noise canceling headphones or air buds to help me with my headaches. I don’t know what I will do if I were to have a crying fit at school.

Also another another side conversation, keppra makes me oddly do stuff. Like I get a boost of “do this task” such as clean my room then it stops. This is all so much and makes my head hurt. I had tension, miragiranes and every other headache you could imagine all day. This really fucking sucks

I want to cry, ever since my first seizure I’ve felt different. Whether it’s the fucking concussion or the medication or both. It’s driving me insane. Everyday I feel like IM regressing as a person.

Looking back at when I used to have a job, I was good at it. I really was my boss constantly bragged about me and my other co worker. I know it sounds like I’m boosting atm and he may not had meant those words but to me at least they felt true. After my first seizure you can see my health due to my concussion I received from my seizure decline. I began asking for off days. Then I could hardly showed up at work without having to leave. After that I had to be told by the doctors to stay at home as I wasn’t making any progress. Then that progress turn into rehabilitation.

The tension headaches fucking hurt and drive me mad. They feel like anxiety chest pains but inside my head and crushing it. It feels like your brain is bleeding. To describe it, it feels like your brain is trying to feel pain but you can’t feel it but it’s there. It’s crushing your head.

I feel like I’m going mad and insane. J can stop crying what’s going on with me. I know it’s not the medication I was like this before the medication. I want it all to stop. I want my old mind back without the memory problems the medication the dizziness the headaches the everything.

I’m sorry for keep posting in here. I really am and I don’t mean to spam.

But I found out something to help with my crying sessions. Typically I have crying sessions when im overwhelmed or just in general. I know they aren’t side affects of keppra because I’ve been having them ever since I developed this. Keppra makes my brain drowsy, and almost a lot of times my parents have been putting me in situations where it’s REALLY overwhelming (luckily they have been a lot better at it and tend to take me home once I start crying they’re new to this whole “disable child” thing lol all jokes)

I think it’s the keppra helping me sleep because before being put on it I usally tend to cry till I would throw up. Luckily now all I do is hyperventilate lmao.

So then I would be taken home and knock out. Sleeping helps me recover. Usally I would cry for hours on end but now i just need to be put to bed given my stuff toy Bunni (I love bunnies hehe) and put to bed.

Just im chronically exhausted yk? It feels like my body is constantly in pain but honestly I’ll much rather be in physical pain than the mental pain I’ve experienced since then.

Sorry if the post doesn’t make sense or anything just im really tired woke up from a 2 hour power nap and went to eat with my family (im tired from being out and up) so yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh im so sleepy atm

Everyone keeps telling me how it’s okay or genuinely open up about my eplsiey. I went 16 years being as healthy up until I randomly developed it. I feel like a brand new person and suffer everyday because of it. I know people mean no harm when they mean it’ll okay and not to stress out. Just wish it was, I use to be smart. Now im exhausted beyond belief and people tell me im lazy and “I just need to try” well if I do try and push thru the brain fog and exhausted what do you think will happen to me hmm!!!????

It’s so stupid. This is so stupid. Sorry im just so angry, my older brother properly tried flaring up my sezuires and when I began crying he just left me there a sobbing mess for my parents to deal with. In which my mom told me “whenever you do feel stress and like your about to have one just take a deep breath” I really wish it was that simple. Sometimes she tells me im purposely doing it, feels like I’m going insane in this home.

In my crying fits my sister yelled at me to shut up and stop crying, I was on the ground foaming on the mouth, is this considered a seizure???? Idfk the doctors keep blaming it on my concussion and say I’ll be like this for a couple of months and get over it. But Mexican families am I right? 🥲 seriously though someone tell me if this is just regular teenager homorome stuff or is theyre something I should be concerned about

I dunno if this is just because I had a concussion but after I had gotten my first sezuire I’ve been experiencing crying fits a lot, even pre keppra I would cry none stop, it’s mainly whenever I would become overstimulated or just in general. The crying can last up to hours and turn into screaming and puking. Just wanted to ask is this normal with eplitic people, I don’t think it’s a “aura” I actually haven’t had any sezuires besides that one in June. But my eeg says im eplitic so 🫠 I also had a crying fits after my eeg at the doctors so when I was suppose to do my sleeping test I was too busy crying my eyes out lmao the doctors are really nice and sweet about it though

I’m visiting Michoacán all next week with my family on a farm, is there anything to know before hand? I’m really scared to go

I (16F) am going back to school August 11th, I had a eeg I don’t remember I think a month after I had my first seizure ever on June 24th, my mom tried to hide my eeg but I went behind her back and read my results, I didn’t experienced any seizures during my eeg but during the hyperventilation test that’s when my brain showed high levels of seizures activity, my test results said I have a increase risk of generalized onset seizures. I don’t know what to do, I’m scared to go back to school and have another sezuire, I’m not diagnosed with epilepsy or anything like that (after my eeg my docotor just sent me and my mom home and while we were in the car I got my test results which neither my mom or me understood well since it was in docotor talk if anyone understands) should I bring it up to my doctor? I DOMT have another scheduled appointment with my doctor until August 12th and that’s just a regular checkup… ☹️