u/TypeThese9350

If I use washable pee pads as the bedding, is it necessary to add another layer (like fleece) on top? Since the washable pee pads themselves have wick and absorbing layers already

I am allergic to Timothy, is this the right alternative?

Hello everyone. I am 28F, in a now 7 year relationship with my fiancé 30M. We have two children together, 8M (from previous relationship but my fiance has raised with me alone) and 3M. Anyways, my fiance is a gamer. And so am I to be fair. However when he gets home from work, he sits down at his computer to game, twitch, YouTube,and call his friends the whole time on discord until about 10-11pm. At that point he will watch part of a show or movie with me and usually fall asleep within about 30 minutes after. On the weekends if we aren’t going anywhere, he turns on the computer the minute he wakes up and is on usually until 11pm-midnight. It bothers me. After work I totally get wanting to relax, do what you want. But he has no balance with us, his family. I’m uncomfortable talking about my feelings in person because he will scoff at me, or look at me in a way that just makes me feel uncomfortable and wishing I never said anything. So I have Text him in the past, making it clear, I am lonely, tired of doing everything with the kids alone. Bathing, playing, feeding, spending time with them, making appointments (the list goes on) alone. I tell him I want to feel like a couple, like a team who are co-parenting together. I make it clear I value his free time, I never want to take away his relaxation time, and his hobbies. But he can’t just have no responsibilities all day long, and also barely spend any time with me. In the past he responds saying “you’re saying I’m a bad dad” or “sorry I’m so terrible” to which I apologize profusely for and go on to clarify no, I don’t think those things are true. And he says he will work on things. These changes never last longer than 24 hours. We have had these text conversations about 5 times now, throughout the last 2 years or so. Today I was feeling especially down, I text him telling him so. I said I am really feeling tired of things, this is not how I wanted things to be when we met. I love him so much I just want him to be an active part of our lives. He never replied. Came home 30 mins late from work, stayed away from me for another 30 instead of coming into the living room where I was. And then ultimately acted like nothing happened. Talked to me normally, he did vacuum for me while I tutored our oldest. Which I appreciated and said so. But this is how it always goes. Little to no response, a few changed behaviors out of what I am guessing is guilt, and no communication at all. I’m guessing by the weekend things will be back to normal. I am so extremely bothered that he didn’t reply to me, and that we can never have a healthy conversation about things. I want to ask him now, hey, can we talk about what I told you earlier, how I was feeling? But he will not be happy, and I’ll be lucky if I get a response that is anything but sarcasm and dismissive. Am I asking too much??? How can I possibly get through to him? I am so lonely in so many ways. I find myself thinking of when we first dated, before he moved in and how much we would talk on the phone and text and I miss it because we talked and communicated more then than we ever do now. I want to feel like I am in a relationship and in a partnership more than 30mins- 1 hour right before bed every night.