u/Undisguised_em

So my dad is a clinical psychologist. Done his studies from one of top institutes, so had the chance to literally go anywhere in the world, but chose to stay near his hometown (tier 2 city) cause according to him "family ke paas aur saath rehna was important" and his trust towards siblings/parents was just too much.

Things went well initially, but when he started earning good money, and cause we're younger (I was 7-8 and my bro was 1-2 yrs), dad's brother (Jobless, as he left his mnc job in Delhi and went back to his hometown, a tier 3 city for god knows what reason) started saying stuff like "your kids are small now, you can help us, later we'll help them too". Dad said no, but heavy pressure and emotional blackmail from his parents and his 2 sister's made him accept it. So dad ended up paying for both cousins school & college expenses and also helped A LOT in medical expenses of uncle, aunt and one cousin. Eventually most savings got drained...

By 2022, we're living in a rented apartment (11k rent) and things were okay (I was in 12th). Dad had around 6-7 lakhs invested in mutual funds, but no emergency fund, no FD, just some extra cash in bank.

Then dad decided to buy a house (his sole reason was he was already 56 and thought after few years banks won't give him a loan). He spent around 3.5 lakhs in registry, 3 lakhs in home improvements (modular kitchen, false ceiling etc.) and took a 37 lakh loan for 20 years. By the time we shifted to new house, we literally had around 1 month expenses in bank and maybe 2 months in mutual funds (monthly expense around 46k, home EMI itself was 33k).

So after like 3 months, all savings got over, and now dad was dependent on this month's salary to pay next month's emi, and his income dropped too (yup not even 30k), so he started taking small loans from fufaji (they too bought just below us). So overtime, debt increased to 1.6 lakhs. (Till this point, I was not fully aware of the actual condition, nor I was too educated in these stuffs much)

Then 2024 came and it was time for my college, but we had practically nothing saved (even loan wasn't really an option). I even asked that same uncle and elder cousin (both cousins are now settled and doing great) for help, but they mostly ignored/dodged it. So I took online BCA from SRM (didn't want engineering anyway)

During 2024-25 I learnt some financial terms myself and managed to grow two YouTube channels to some extent that they're able to generate 25-30k monthly plus dad's income, so we managed to reduce debt to 1.2 lakhs, and build around 70k in savings+fd. But November hit us again. Dad had to leave one consultancy place which alone paid around 25k/month (~45% of his income). And my earnings too got dropped cause of exams and all. So, that 70k savings was eventually down to just 15k in next 6 months. Dad has a pretty strong reputation locally, so I tried helping him get some online attention, but it never really got many eyes (his YouTube channel tanked too).

Current situation:

Dad mostly earns just enough to pay the EMI (30k every month on 10th). So im the one who manages most of expenses. And i too am having a hard time cause now i manage

• My semester fees
• Younger brother's school + coaching fees (~1 lakh/year)
• Most groceries
• Random household expenses

all with 18-22k/month

Past 4 years I've mostly been stuck at home because everything became online mode. No friends, no vehicle, no gym, always financial pressure. And honestly I have developed a lot of resentment towards those relatives because even today they act normal and protective towards their own kids, while we are struggling. And collectively, all these causing mental breakdown a lot recently so i thought to share and ask what should be the optimal choice from here on