u/Upbeat-Mix3627

I'm in my last year (I'm in South Africa) and for the last three years I can't get above a 60% my marks have been dropping ever since and I don't know what to do anymore. In just 3 days I'm starting with exams and I can't study properly. I've used past papers, used notes and all and information just doesn't stick in my head. It's particularly worse when it comes to subjects like Maths and Biology. I want to apply to uni overseas but with my marks there's no way I'm getting accepted. I can't afford a tutor or get concentration medication. I'm stuck and I feel completely hopeless with no idea what I'm going to do with my life. Please help

I don't know what's wrong with me anymore, I feel like I'm not developing properly like I should. I'm slow, don't have the best grades (I'll get to that in a bit) and I'm genuinely so awkward it's not even funny. For starters I used to do online school and I did it for one year and a half but my social skills got worse from there. I begged my mom to let me go back to an actual high school so I can interact with people and get myself out of depression as well better my grades. One year has passed and I feel myself being more stressed than ever. When I talk I mumble and mix up my words alot and when people talk to me I can't hear properly (I'm not deaf). My grades have actually gotten worse and I'm in my last year of high school, no matter how I study I can't retain information and I just end up forgetting everything in my exams. I feel even more lonely even though I have friends, it just makes me want to isolate myself more from everyone so as to not continue embarrassing myself in front of everyone. I'm not even interesting to talk to both online and in real life. I can't form proper arguments or be able to express my opinion.

I don't know what to do anymore and I don't want to find myself back to how I was in the past. Please help.