What do I do?
So I (40m) and my STBX (37f) have been separated since this fall. It started with a stupid argument. We were together for over 15 years. After having two kids those little arguments blew up into more. I was made to believe it was my fault. She told me she wasn't happy and I'm not the person she fell in love with. Turns out...there was someone else. I figured it out after about a month. I shut down. I told her I knew and I was done. I can never trust her again. The last 4 months have been pure gaslighting. She tried to control me. The breaking point...I finally met someone. Her response...I can't believe there is someone else that would make you happy. I can't believe you won't be the person I need you to be for me to make you happy. She's using our kids as pawns. She hates that I'm happy. She still needs my help because she can't provide for our kids when she has them. What do I do? How do I continue to respect her as a mother who I need to help support our children while knowing how controlling and disloyal she is? When she needs money how do I trust that it's for my kids?