I realized I'm not trading markets. I'm trading my own regret.
I used to think my weakness was bad entries. It’s not. My actual problem is that a red number completely alters my personality.
I've been forcing myself to use a simulator lately, just messed around with the bydfi demo account because I wanted a clean slate without real money pressure. But guess what? The toxic loop followed me anyway.
I still found myself closing winners too early, watching the price reverse, FOMO re-entering at a worse price, and calling it ""confirmation."" By the time the session ended, the simulated PnL was somehow green, but the process was disgusting. I wasn't executing a edge; I was just trying to outrun the feeling of regret.
Guess a simulator can't recreate real money pressure, but it absolutely makes your psychological flaws visible—if you're honest enough to look at them. Back to the drawing board before I risk any real size.