my heart is wobbly because that door cannot be opened for you
I pass by you and only interact with you when necessary. You occupied no thought in my mind. In fact i would have described you as “sometimes cold, sometimes kind, I’m not sure, don’t really know, don’t really care.” I wouldn’t be surprised to know that you just learned my name in these last few months after years.
So it surprised me one day when you passed by me and my stomach did a flipiddy flip and my heart felt wobbly in my chest. I was shocked, it was sudden, especially since you were no where on my mind prior. But then it happened a second time, and my mind started going blank around you. I had to ask myself when did you start occupying a thought in my mind? Was it the kindness I saw you give to the ones who couldn’t give it back to you? Or was it the fact that I learned that you have a cat?
I’m so confused at how ppl suddenly and randomly enter the vicinity of our minds.
I’ll let this die out because realistically this can’t turn into anything. And maybe my youth is passing me by and I want to settle down and have some stability in my life and my heart thinks I’m running out of time.
But we are not something that could ever be… you’re just a visitor in my mind. And my heart is just wobbly because that door cannot be opened for you. But thank you for letting me know my heart still has a door.