u/_sarentu_tamtey_

🙄 i knew this day would come and u know what i would be fine with it if i would have a beard and my hipps would get less. but no.

i already reduced my testo Gel as my doc suggested.
And i went to donate blood as i read this could also
help. didnt go as well (only donated 100ml) but whatever.

My question is, how fast did reducing T help with that? and were i able to go higher again?

Will this be forever now?

sorry english aint my first language

Almost 2 years Single and out with my ExGf (pwBPD) and no near starting ever a new relationship.
The ick i developed through this relationship is at a point where i almost have to stop myself cause its turning bad the other way (an we all know what the extreme does)

My ex gf constaltly cried, had "a bad day" (like girl when do you have ever a good day?)
And constantly relied on me when she had any type of emotion. never apologized, always blamed me at the end...

Went deep into myself after the relationship and had to addmit that i had a massive problem (aka choosing women that are close in destructive behavior like my mom). Went to therapy and i am now at a point where i gained so much peace that i almost cant deal with peoples tears and negativity.

I have no support system anymore, i am completely alone. do everything alone. and i know i sound like a victim here but noone ever took care of me. was just always me giving. And now i almost cant give anymore.

If i see a woman cry or having a bad day (may that be a friend) i am there and closely watch my boundaries. i dont take their feelings home but i am there with action. Thing is i feel completely different. I usually catch myself thinking horrible things like "shut up please... it aint that deep" and i just dont wanna end up as the guy who takes action in these thought.

i think the best i can do is aknowlaging whats happening here and give myself some grace and normality. i often feel that things turn easier when normalized.

I got traumatized, gave too much, got badly scarred and this is now my physical reaction.

i choose compasion and kindness actively when someone cries or is in their feelings because lets be honest, the problem were never the feelings itself but rather the blame and massive care that came along that and the backlash because nothing was ever good enough.

So if you feel the same way, you aint alone.

Just stay kind and set boundaries if needed.

Since the breakup nearly 2 years ago with my exGf (PwBPD) i havent touched a woman nor did i think about one. But i know the time will come.
The discard from my Ex was cruel, the relationship damaging and the breakup so traumatic that i feared for my life cause i thought imma die from a heartattack.

I know a lot of women these days like to watch tiktoks especially about relationship and what to ask on a date.

"what did you learn about yourself in your last relationship"

"how was your last relationship"
or even a simple
"why did you guys break up."

how do you answer these questions without trauma dumping and on the other hand sugar coating things and cover up the truth that ure allowed to speak after all u went through.

i kept silent my hole relationship. i dont want to do that anymore.

i fear that i have to ditch every single question that goes around that topic cause if im gonna be honest i look like an ass.

i tired of even thinking about it.

My ex truly robbed me of normal skills