u/adventurer309

I offend people just by opening my mouth

don’t know if it is an adhd/neurodivergent thing but I really annoy and hurt other people’s feelings with how clueless I guess I am socially. it makes me feel bad because I mess up so badly that I get blocked. I know I deserve it and it’s within their right, but it sucks. and it hurts when I’m just trying to get to know someone, but the ways I have of doing that are probably bad and I’m probably bad at communicating with others. I don’t really know what else to do. I wish I could just be myself. I know I can of course with the right people.

But as I’ve grown over the years and stepped into myself more, and even very very recently because I’ve been doing a lot of inner work on myself, I lose more and more people. I’ve even lost nearly my entire family. I don’t have close friends. I struggle so much with connecting and having conversation. like this one woman on here I was messaging. I was asking her questions but she wasn’t and I felt she was uninterested. Anyway I fucked that up too and she blocked me. I’m not trying to play victim or whatever. I’m no victim. It is what it is, but yeah it hurts. It sucks

the more I step into myself and feel comfortable within myself the more people I lose and the harder it is to have close friends. if I’m being myself and doing inner work, being the best I can, why are people shedding away from me rather than wanting to get closer? people seem to enjoy me from a distance but no one seems to wanna spend time with me or get to know me. maybe I am not putting in enough effort. I don’t know, I’m clueless past this

reddit.com
u/adventurer309 — 1 hour ago

I feel ready to meet my wife

this doesn’t mean I’m the most perfect version of myself. but I feel ready. I’m ready. I don’t want to even have the label girlfriend anymore. I want a wife, and I want to be a wife. I know of course relationships take time; I don’t wish to rush at all. I guess I haven’t figured out how to explain it better. I’m ready. I just have to meet her. She has to be out there. I’ve had such awful luck in love and I seem to not vibe with most people so I’m not entirely convinced that she is out there but I say she has to be because I have always been such a lover and a fighter, and I have so much love that there is no way I can’t share it and my life with another woman. I have so much love to share and I wanna give it all to my wife.

reddit.com
u/adventurer309 — 1 day ago