Browsed all green co-ords in Shein, but no luck. I'm in the province and need some help to narrow down the stores when I visit MM.
Maybe Zara, H&M, Banana Republic? Where can I find this pretty olive set? Reddit, do your magic!
Ang kukulit ng doggos, naglalaro sila sa backyard namin. Kung saan saan sumusuot, pero di alam paano lumabas haha.
Problem/Goal: How do you actually enforce “their emergency is not yours,” especially during medical emergencies?
For people who stopped overextending themselves for family: how did you deal with the guilt? Did it damage your family relationships? Does it still bother you now?
Context:
My grandfather recently needed emergency surgery. I (28F) live with my grandparents and I'm basically their primary caretaker and the breadwinner of my extended family. I moved back to the province when I started working from home. I buy groceries, maintenance meds, and usually decide when/how they get treatment.
Their 3 children all have their own problems:
I earn 6 digits, but I also support my mom and sibling in college. I’m about to undergo dental surgery myself, and I’m trying to save for my future too (masters + digital nomad visa).
The hospital bill is now over 100k, and everyone expects me to shoulder my father’s share. Usually I pay upfront for my grandparents’ medical expenses, then my aunt and uncle send me their share later. But I still end up covering almost half.
What makes it harder is that my father was abusive growing up, so it frustrates me that I’m the one carrying responsibilities he walked away from.
I’m honestly jealous of my cousin sometimes. She lives next door but has been able to say no because her mom already pays her share.
I love my grandparents, but I’m starting to resent how much of the burden falls on me. Part of me wants to stop stretching myself thin and let the rest of the family deal with it. But if I stop stepping in, my grandparents are the ones who suffer.
Therapy made me realize one of my biggest fears is ending up with nothing and no one to rely on financially. But I don’t even know what healthy boundaries look like in situations like this. So, how did you set your boundaries?
Previous Attempts:
Hindi ko pa na-try na hindi mag-ambag 🥲