u/alsonbasnet

Is Sisyphus really happy?
Maybe it doesn’t want to be.
It just want to be tormented ,
To toil all day,
Just to do it
Again and again.
Nobody asked it.
It only lives a day
To push the stone .
What if
it doesn’t even want to
Think about tomorrow ,
Not even the night .
What if
It does what feels right
In the moment.
why do we assume
It needs to be happy?
What if
It doesn’t even know that feeling ?
What if
It wants to be sad?
There is nothing bad in that.
The weight of the stone
Is heavier than any question .
No past to regret ,
No future to fear,
Only the push.
Maybe the struggle is not suffering
Until we name it so.
Maybe it’s the pleasure.
It does not curse the hill.
It does not praise it.
It moves
Because it moves.
And in that motion,
There is something bigger than joy,
Something deeper than despair,
A stillness inside the endless climb.
Not happiness -
Just being itself.

Is Sisyphus really happy?
Maybe it doesn’t want to be.
It just want to be tormented ,
To toil all day,
Just to do it
Again and again.
Nobody asked it.
It only lives a day
To push the stone .
What if
it doesn’t even want to
Think about tomorrow ,
Not even the night .
What if
It does what feels right
In the moment.
why do we assume
It needs to be happy?
What if
It doesn’t even know that feeling ?
What if
It wants to be sad?
There is nothing bad in that.
The weight of the stone
Is heavier than any question .
No past to regret ,
No future to fear,
Only the push.
Maybe the struggle is not suffering
Until we name it so.
Maybe it’s the pleasure.
It does not curse the hill.
It does not praise it.
It moves
Because it moves.
And in that motion,
There is something bigger than joy,
Something deeper than despair,
A stillness inside the endless climb.
Not happiness -
Just being itself.

Where are you hiding?
Come close to me
I wanna write about you
Your hair,
your eyes ,
Deep as ocean
Your smile,
The crack of first dawn
After a rain
your lips
Soft as petals
Your perfect imperfection
Your voice,
The crooked laugh
your silhouette
Reflecting in my door
Where are you hiding
Come close to me
I wanna paint your picture
With these clumsy hands
I am a terrible painter
But knowing it’s you
In the picture
Somewhere in all that colour
Makes even the mess fell like art
Where are you hiding
Come close to me
I wanna lost in your eyes
So deep, so deep
Like sinking through still water
Where sound dissolves
And light bend
Time stops
It’s almost impossible
For me
To find the surface
I wanna stay in you
Not a single person
But as whole
Of you and me
Where are you hiding
Come close to me
I wanna hold you forever
Like two pages of
The same open book
Never letting you go
But only if you want
Where are you hiding
Come close to me
I am waiting for so long
I wanna grow old with you
Silver-haired
Teasing with you
Living with you

The clock on the wall says midnight
What time is it over there?
Sleep just sways away from me
Are you still awake?
Or did you fall asleep?
I don’t yet know you
But I am waiting
Waiting patiently
To listen to your stories
As if I am reading my favourite book
I am watching this moon
Which is more radiant
Than normal
and I wonder
if it’s the same moon
hanging outside your window,
if you ever looked up at it tonight
without knowing
someone was looking too
I am drawing your face
at the same time
my pencil guessing
the curve of your jaw
the way your eyes might close
when something makes you laugh
the shape of a smile
I haven’t seen yet
but somehow I already recognise
I don’t know if I got it right
Maybe I got it all wrong
But I folded it carefully
and kept it somewhere safe
for the day you finally show me
how far off I was
And we’ll laugh
I think
You’ll laugh at the face
I drew
before I knew yours
The clock now says
almost one
I still don’t know
what time it is over there
But I hope
wherever you are
sleep found you gently.

Where are you hiding?
Come close to me
I wanna write about you
Your hair,
your eyes ,
Deep as ocean
Your smile,
The crack of first dawn
After a rain
your lips
Soft as petals
Your perfect imperfection
Your voice,
The crooked laugh
your silhouette
Reflecting in my door
Where are you hiding
Come close to me
I wanna paint your picture
With these clumsy hands
I am a terrible painter
But knowing it’s you
In the picture
Somewhere in all that colour
Makes even the mess fell like art
Where are you hiding
Come close to me
I wanna lost in your eyes
So deep, so deep
Like sinking through still water
Where sound dissolves
And light bend
Time stops
It’s almost impossible
For me
To find the surface
I wanna stay in you
Not a single person
But as whole
Of you and me
Where are you hiding
Come close to me
I wanna hold you forever
Like two pages of
The same open book
Never letting you go
But only if you want
Where are you hiding
Come close to me
I am waiting for so long
I wanna grow old with you
Silver-haired
Teasing with you
Living with you

The sun is out there
But it doesn’t reach me
The clouds hover around
I am just waiting patiently
For rain and clear my sky
I can feel storms coming my way
Hoping they will sweep the pain away
There is thunder inside me
But i can’t let it out
Only I can hear it
It’s ruining my peace
Thoughts strike me
Harder than the lightning
And it’s like this all the time
Even with all of it
I cannot shine
My heart is colder
As if it’s snowing
I can’t ignite the fire
Cause it’s the rain
That Turns it off
The rain which
I was waiting for patiently
But the smoke gathers
And makes the clouds again
In my sky
Which hover all inside me
And won’t let
The sun shine

I drink coffee before bed
So I can blame it
For not falling asleep
It got nothing to do with you

I punched the wall hard
So I can blame it
For the pain in my knuckles(heart)
It got nothing to do with you

I listen to the saddest song
So I can blame them
For the tears running down my face
It got nothing to do with you

I walk through throbbing thorns
So I can blame them
For the piercing in my skin
It got nothing to do with you

I replay all my bad moments
So I can blame them
For not being happy
It got nothing to do with you

I let myself sink in this misery
So I can blame it
For not being able to live
It got nothing to do with you

There is a house of anxiety in my mind
walls are very fragile as if it’s made with glass
The doors keep shut, lights on all night
Nobody is allowed to get inside
If they do, they will break the walls
I have to deal with broken pieces of glass
The roof is open, but still suffocating
The windows are closed all the time
Can’t peek outside of the house
Living without contacting the world
Pain grows deeper as I grow old
There is a dark hallway in the house
Where I keep waiting for someone
Who I never let them come
There is only mattress in a bedroom
Which never let me rest
Keep roaming the house all the time
How did I build such a house
Where I got trapped by myself
Even though I am the architect
I couldn’t find the way out
I might end up getting locked
maybe part of me loves the lock

There is a house of anxiety in my mind
walls are very fragile as if it’s made with glass
The doors keep shut, lights on all night
Nobody is allowed to get inside
If they do, they will break the walls
I have to deal with broken pieces of glass
The roof is open, but still suffocating
The windows are closed all the time
Can’t peek outside of the house
Living without contacting the world
Pain grows deeper as I grow old
There is a dark hallway in the house
Where I keep waiting for someone
Who I never let them come
There is only mattress in a bedroom
Which never let me rest
Keep roaming the house all the time
How did I build such a house
Where I got trapped by myself
Even though I am the architect
I couldn’t find the way out
I might end up getting locked
maybe part of me loves the lock

There is a house of anxiety in my mind
walls are very fragile as if it’s made with glass
The doors keep shut, lights on all night
Nobody is allowed to get inside
If they do, they will break the walls
I have to deal with broken pieces of glass
The roof is open, but still suffocating
The windows are closed all the time
Can’t peek outside of the house
Living without contacting the world
Pain grows deeper as I grow old
There is a dark hallway in the house
Where I keep waiting for someone
Who I never let them come
There is only mattress in a bedroom
Which never let me rest
Keep roaming the house all the time
How did I build such a house
Where I got trapped by myself
Even though I am the architect
I couldn’t find the way out
I might end up getting locked
maybe part of me loves the lock

I saw him standing in front of me —
a young man,
elegant and quietly free.
His eyes held everything
I had buried,
every truth I refused to see.
I couldn’t believe it was me.
Just my reflection ,
my real self waiting patiently,
while I kept running .
He wanted to speak,
but I turned away.
Every time he stepped closer,
I am scared to face him —
he will show me
how long I have been living
as only half of me.
Yet he waits, unshaken,
with steady hands ,
and steady gaze.
Until I stop running.
One day,
he will walk toward me
and I won’t flinch.
We will stand face to face,
no longer two separate roads,
but one path.
Side by side,
holding each other’s hands —
the hidden me
and the me I show the world
finally becoming whole.

We will go to bookstore,
You will show me what you like,
And I will show you what I like.
With every page turned,
New memories will be formed.
I will show you my favourite lines;
You will read them out loud.
I will fall in love with your voice
And try to embrace your choice.

We will read a new book together,
Make it our favourite one.
We will buy two copies,
One for me and one for you.
While we read many books,
That one will be ours favourite;
We will read that one again and again.

Many years will pass;
We will read many books,
But that one book will always be special.
We will remember the bookstore;
That book will remind us of this moment,
When we found each other between the shelves.

Every time we read it again,
We will go back to that day,
To the bookstore,to the beginning of us.
And when we’re old,
We will still have two copies
Sitting side by side.
Two completely different stories,
In a single book, behold.