u/anallog_whorer

As of today I’m officially free from dysphoria and fear.

I am now permanently sterilized.

Thank you to all who contributed to this sub to make it possible for me and all the others to obtain freedom and autonomy of their own bodies.

Never in a million years would I dream that this could be possible and yet here I am.

I am now free to live without fear. I can exist at peace in my body now.

I’m still loopy from anesthesia and the pain meds so I cannot articulate my thoughts but I just needed to celebrate n put it into the universe so it seems a lil more real in my head.

Pre op is on the 18th, surgery the 19th

A few nights ago while I was drifting off to sleep, my brain decided to be mean and play a vivid scene over and over again.
I’m terrified for the lead up to the surgery, waiting in hospital, scrubbing down, and the wheel off to the OR and the count down to knockout in that scary ass sterile room.

I’m so fucking scared. My mom is coming with me for support but there will be a point they take me outta that room with her, to the operating room alone.

Originally I was just psyching myself out over the belly button incision but now it’s so much more. In my pre op appointment I am going to ask if they can do the palmers point incision instead of my belly button.

I’m also scared of not being able to wear retainers in my piercings. I have quite a few and some I don’t trust to leave jewelry out of them.

Any way to ease my worries or should I just thug it out? :(

I keep trying to tell myself that this is better than ever accidentally falling ill to the P word. I truly do want this with every fiber of my being but that doesn’t mean I’m not terrified.