u/annoyedgrunt

We are completing an open adoption of a newborn, and will continue contact, including in-person visits, with the birth mother. The adoption was due to the birth mother being too young and not in a stable circumstance to raise a child at this time, but she is a lovely young woman who I’m sure will go on to accomplish wonderful things, in part because she chose to adopt her child and grant herself the space to grow.

From the perspective of the adoptive parents, bio parents or adopted child, how best can we ensure our child grows up knowing that they were so loved by both their birth and adoptive parents that this adoption occurred? We don’t want to inadvertently color their view of their birth mother or their own adoption into something negative, so what are some tips or methods to make sure their origin is not a source of insecurity, fear or confusion?

We are about to adopt a newborn who is due any day now. Birth mother has a name she would like us to use as a middle name, and we are happy to do so, but we also have a a first + middle name we had in mind. Should we simply use our first name choice + her middle name choice, or would it be annoying for our girl longterm having 2 middle names?

Due to privacy reasons, I don’t want to list the exact name options here, but think classically spelled and common but not overly so for all names: 4-letter, 2-syllable first name, feminine 8-letter, 2-syllable middle name (our pick), gender neutral 7-letter, 3-syllable middle name (bio mom pick), and then 5-letter, 2-syllable last name.

All 4 names flow well together, as would just the 3 if we dropped our middle name pick, and the middle name order is not chosen to diminish the bio mom’s pick, but simply because the name flows nicer in that order.

I think the only reason I’m leaning towards keeping our middle name pick is because it was one of my favorite name options, whereas the first name pick is a name I like well enough, but was my husband’s top choice. I also recognize that fixating on names is likely going to be such a tiny thing once she actually arrives, but I don’t want to overload her with names purely because I was anxious awaiting her arrival and went overboard!

Adopting a newborn due soon, and hope to establish care with a local pediatrician. We are based in Hixson, but will be spending our first 1-2 months in Ft O/Ringgold area. Any infant pediatrician recommendations for either of those areas (of course, we’re happy to travel for great clinicians)?