You are God's way of saying sorry for all the heartbreaks I had before.

I should’ve written this a long time ago, but I’ve been wanting to put into words just how grateful I am for my boyfriend, K.

K, the guy I ghosted for a month last year. The guy I had been mutuals with on Instagram for months but never actually met or dated. We were just two random people replying to each other’s stories every now and then. I honestly don’t know exactly how it happened, but somehow, this man became one of the best things that has ever happened to me.

For the longest time, I tried dating different kinds of men. Broke, narcissistic, arrogant, cheaters, womanizers, you name it. After experiencing all of that, you really can’t blame me for building my walls too high. Who wouldn’t be afraid of ending up with the wrong person and having that person become their partner for life?

But then there was K.

He never gave me mixed signals. He was certain about me from the very beginning. He was certain that he liked me, certain that he wanted to date me, and now that we’re together, he’s just as certain that he wants to marry me. Imagine being with someone who talks about saving for our marriage, our future home, and the family we might build someday. It’s such a different kind of reassurance, the kind that makes you feel like someone isn’t just dating you for the present, but genuinely sees you in their future.

One of the things I love most about K is how patient and understanding he is. He has such a long patience with me, even during moments when I know I can be difficult. Whenever we have arguments, he’s usually the first one to say sorry. We talk things through, we resolve our problems, and we never allow each other to go to sleep carrying resentment. We may not always agree, but we always choose to understand each other and fix things together.

He also shows his love in ways that sometimes make me realize that I’ve been looking at love through the standards I see on social media.

He travels from Pampanga to Taguig every weekend just to spend time with me. He bought me a smart monitor because I once mentioned how inconvenient it was to connect my laptop to a regular monitor. He bought me a printer because I told him I wanted to print my handouts for my review. He even bought me a Nespresso machine because I complained about how impractical it was to spend ₱300+ on coffee every day.

And honestly, every single thing he has given me feels like it came straight from his heart. Not because I asked for them, but because he listens to the little things I say and remembers them. He simply wants to make my life a little easier and make me happy.

I used to get tampo and wonder why I didn’t receive flowers as often as I saw other couples receiving them. But I’m slowly learning that love doesn’t always look the same for everyone. Maybe K’s way of saying “I love you” isn’t always through flowers. Maybe it’s through the long drives from Pampanga, the things he remembers, the things he fixes, the things he buys because he knows they would make my life easier, and the way he consistently shows up for me.

And honestly, those things mean so much more to me.

What makes our story even more special is that we both had lives before we met each other. We both dated other people, explored, got to know different kinds of people, and, at some point, got our hearts broken. We both had experiences that taught us what we wanted, what we didn’t want, and what kind of love we deserved.

Sometimes I think about all the heartbreaks I had to go through before meeting him. And if someone gave me the chance to go back in time and experience all of them again, the disappointment, the pain, the wrong people, the tears, the lessons, I think I would. If the prize at the end of all those heartbreaks was K, I would gladly go through them all over again. Because somehow, all those wrong turns led me to the right person.

Maybe that’s why I don’t regret the things that happened before him anymore. They may have hurt me at the time, but they also brought me to a place where I could recognize and appreciate the kind of love K gives me. And maybe all the things he went through before meeting me were necessary too, because somehow, after everything, we still found each other.

I used to pray to God that whenever I dated someone, He would remove that person from my life if he wasn’t meant to be my lifetime partner. I wanted God to protect me from wasting my time with someone who wasn’t meant for me.

But with K, my prayer has changed.

Instead of asking God to take him away if he isn’t meant for me, I find myself praying that God helps me become a better person for him. I pray that I become the kind of partner he deserves. I pray that we continue to grow together, become better for each other, and learn how to love each other more deeply as the years go by.

I want K to be my forever partner.

I want to build a life with him. I want to have a home with him, build a family with him, and experience all the ordinary and extraordinary things that life has to offer together. I want to look back someday and remember that it all started with two people who were just randomly replying to each other’s Instagram stories.

I don’t know what the future holds, but I sincerely hope that ten years from now, or even twenty, we’ll still be this way still choosing each other, still laughing together, still making each other feel loved, and still coming home to each other after every difficult day.

I am so grateful that out of all the people I could have met, somehow, I met you.

And out of all the people I could have loved, somehow, I ended up loving you.

Maybe we really did have to meet other people first. Maybe we had to get lost, explore, and get our hearts broken before we could finally find each other. And if that was the price we had to pay to end up here, then I think it was worth it.

Thank you for being certain about me when I had so many reasons to be afraid.

Thank you for being patient with me.

Thank you for choosing me, consistently.

And most of all, thank you for making me believe that maybe, just maybe, love can be this peaceful, this intentional, and this certain.

I love you, K. And if I had to live through every heartbreak all over again just to find you at the end of it, I would.

Every single time.

Because if you were the prize waiting for me at the end of it all, I’d choose the journey all over again.

reddit.com
u/ashlynxlove — 4 days ago

Need Advice

(sorry, r/Pampanga didn't allow me to post there kasi this post is related daw for job hunting hahaha)

Hello! I’m F27, currently a PGI in Makati, and I have a partner (M30) who is currently a resident in Pampanga.

We’ve been talking about where we should settle once I take my boards and start residency. The options are either stay in Makati for my residency and have him travel weekly, or move to Pampanga and eventually have a house built there and would pursue residency there as well.

The problem is, I’m planning to pursue OB-GYN, and I really want to train in a public hospital. Currently, I’m super happy with the hospital where I’m doing my PGIship. Honestly, wala akong makita masyadong cons. I can really see that the work-life balance is surprisingly good despite it being a public hospital. I’ve also asked some of the residents about their salary, and they said na time and pagod lang talaga ang kapalit, but the workload is still very bearable and they’re well-compensated. Plus, hindi rin binabaha dito, which is a huge plus for me. 😂

But then there’s Pampanga. I really want to consider it because of my partner, gustong gusto niya kasi mgstay don, and plano niya tlaga na dun mgpatayo ng bahay for us.

I’ve been considering JBL, but honestly, parang di ko sure kung kakayanin ko yung residency life there. 😭 I also don’t know anyone in Pampanga, so I’m worried na mahihirapan din ako with connections, adjusting to a new environment, etc.

So I’m really torn between:

Makati:

✅ Already comfortable with the hospital

✅ I like the work environment

✅ Good work-life balance

✅ Public hospital

✅ Good compensation according to the residents

✅ No flooding

❌ Long-distance/weekly travel for my partner (for the meantime)

Pampanga:

✅ We can actually live together

✅ Less hassle for my partner

✅ We can start building our life there

❌ I don’t know anyone there

❌ Not sure if I’ll like the training environment

❌ Worried about workload/toxicity

❌ Worried about starting residency without any connections

Would really appreciate advice/insights from anyone who moved from Manila to Pampanga for residency, especially those who pursued OB-GYN in a public hospital.

How was the adjustment? Was it worth giving up a hospital you already liked just to be closer to your partner? And for those who know JBL, how is the actual residency experience there? I’m really torn and would love to hear from people who’ve been in a similar situation. 🥹

TL;DR: F27 PGI in Makati, planning OB-GYN residency + M30 WFH resident partner in Pampanga. I love my current public hospital and its work-life balance, but I’m considering moving to Pampanga so we can live together. Makati people who pursued residency in Pampanga—was it worth it? 😭

reddit.com
u/ashlynxlove — 4 days ago

Title: Need advice: Manila PGI considering residency in Pampanga for love + career 😭

(sorry, r/Pampanga didn't allow me to post there kasi this post is related daw for job hunting hahaha)

Hello! I’m F27, currently a PGI in Makati, and I have a partner (M30) who is currently a resident in Pampanga.

We’ve been talking about where we should settle once I take my boards and start residency. The options are either stay in Makati for my residency and have him travel weekly, or move to Pampanga and eventually have a house built there and would pursue residency there as well.

The problem is, I’m planning to pursue OB-GYN, and I really want to train in a public hospital. Currently, I’m super happy with the hospital where I’m doing my PGIship. Honestly, wala akong makita masyadong cons. I can really see that the work-life balance is surprisingly good despite it being a public hospital. I’ve also asked some of the residents about their salary, and they said na time and pagod lang talaga ang kapalit, but the workload is still very bearable and they’re well-compensated. Plus, hindi rin binabaha dito, which is a huge plus for me. 😂

But then there’s Pampanga. I really want to consider it because of my partner, gustong gusto niya kasi mgstay don, and plano niya tlaga na dun mgpatayo ng bahay for us.

I’ve been considering JBL, but honestly, parang di ko sure kung kakayanin ko yung residency life there. 😭 I also don’t know anyone in Pampanga, so I’m worried na mahihirapan din ako with connections, adjusting to a new environment, etc.

So I’m really torn between:

Makati:

✅ Already comfortable with the hospital

✅ I like the work environment

✅ Good work-life balance

✅ Public hospital

✅ Good compensation according to the residents

✅ No flooding

❌ Long-distance/weekly travel for my partner (for the meantime)

Pampanga:

✅ We can actually live together

✅ Less hassle for my partner

✅ We can start building our life there

❌ I don’t know anyone there

❌ Not sure if I’ll like the training environment

❌ Worried about workload/toxicity

❌ Worried about starting residency without any connections

Would really appreciate advice/insights from anyone who moved from Manila to Pampanga for residency, especially those who pursued OB-GYN in a public hospital.

How was the adjustment? Was it worth giving up a hospital you already liked just to be closer to your partner? And for those who know JBL, how is the actual residency experience there? I’m really torn and would love to hear from people who’ve been in a similar situation. 🥹

TL;DR: F27 PGI in Makati, planning OB-GYN residency + M30 WFH resident partner in Pampanga. I love my current public hospital and its work-life balance, but I’m considering moving to Pampanga so we can live together. Makati people who pursued residency in Pampanga—was it worth it? 😭

reddit.com
u/ashlynxlove — 7 days ago

Would a “Boyfriend Archive” gift idea be too OA for a new relationship?

Hello! I’m a 27F dating a 30M programmer. We’re still relatively new, and honestly, I’m struggling to figure out what to gift him. Sobrang provider niya kasi to the point na I feel bad kasi grabe siya gumastos sakin and there was a time na I cried kasi feeling ko nagiging financial burden niya ako kahit hindi niya intention ipafeel sakin yun.

I’m a doctor, so our fields are VERY different, and I don’t really know much about the things he’s into. 😭 He’s also financially well-off and can pretty much buy whatever he wants for himself, which makes giving him material gifts even harder. Gusto ko lang bumawi kasi I really really love my man and I want to reciprocate his love through thoughtful gifts.

Because of that, I was thinking of giving him something more effort-based instead. I’ve been single for around 7 years, so I honestly feel like I’ve forgotten how to give a guy a gift that’s genuinely coming from a place of “I really, really like you and I want to do something special for you.” 😂

I’m thinking of making him a “Boyfriend Archive” — basically a box/collection of handwritten letters, little keepsakes, and things that are meaningful to our relationship.

So far, I’m thinking of putting:

  1. 🫙 Jar of Hearts — short messages for different emotions/moments (when he’s sad, stressed, happy, doubtful, missing me, etc.)
  2. 💌 Open When Letters — around 20+ envelopes for different situations
  3. ✝️ Prayers for You — Bible verses + personal prayers I wrote for him
  4. 🌸 Flowers — maybe preserved flowers or something meaningful
  5. 🧦 Bleeves — because apparently I’ve decided this is a legitimate gift category 😭
  6. 🙏 A Handwritten Prayer for Our Relationship
  7. 💍 A Sealed Letter for Our Wedding Day — basically a letter from my current self to our hypothetical future selves, to be opened if we ever get married
  8. ❤️ Reasons Why I Love You — specific things I love/appreciate about him
  9. 🚨 Emergency Boyfriend Kit — little things he can use when he’s stressed, tired, having a bad day, etc.
  10. 🥺 “If You Ever Forget…” Letter — a letter reminding him of the things I hope he never forgets about how I see and appreciate him
  11. 🫙 Reasons I Love You Jar — individual notes with specific reasons why I love him

But now I’m wondering if this is WAY TOO MUCH. 😭

Like… we’re both grown adults. He’s 30. I’m 27. We’re not teenagers exchanging 100-page love letters. 😂 I’m worried he might find it corny, overwhelming, or just too much considering we’ve only recently started dating.

At the same time, I genuinely want to give him something that shows effort, especially because I can’t really impress him with an expensive material gift that he couldn’t just buy for himself.

Is this thoughtful and sweet, or am I entering “girl, calm down, you’ve been dating him for 3 weeks” territory? 😭 But honestly, I don’t really mind if this makes me look like a simp HAHAHA. Boyfriend ko naman siya, so why not diba?

And if you were the boyfriend receiving this, would you appreciate it or feel overwhelmed?

I’d also love suggestions for thoughtful gifts for a financially well-off guy that aren’t necessarily expensive but show a LOT of effort and intention.

Please help a girl who has been single for 7 years learn how to boyfriend again. 😭

reddit.com
u/ashlynxlove — 13 days ago