u/at12dev0n

I can sometimes lucid dream. I think only my LW knows about it, so tonight at about 368 days after her passing, she visited me in my dreams. In the past when I lucid dream about her, it would be about past fights or dates in places we were planning to go.

But tonight, I tried to lucid dream what we looked like if we were older. I'm 32 and she was 28 when she died and I really tried to push the limits of my imagination and I nearly got it but woke up crying.

That's it, it's 4:07 am here and I still need to sleep again because my daughter has school later.

Unang bumungad sakin pag open ko ng FB si Respicio.

Tagal na pala nating naglolokohan, tapos dami pa din sa ating naloloko.

Kunwari tahimik pero nag papa abuso.

Kunwari matapang pero kapit sa padrino.

Kunwari makabayan pero uto-uto

Ewan, hirap mong mahalin Pilipinas.

There was a Social Worker that visited us and talked about our living situation for an insurance claim.

Everything was going well until she asked me if I'll remarry, just as I was looking at my daughter. Just spent the next several hours on autopilot until I can leave my daughter to my in laws for a bit and cried in the car going to the cemetery.

That's it for me today.