u/bee-autiful-world

My friend is someone who often gets short with me. In a lot of situations where I haven’t provoked her, just because sometimes I speak quieter or try voice an opinion that she doesn’t like. Sometimes I just shrug it off but I feel like there has been an increasing number of times where she does this, over really small and silly things. I’m finding it hard not to let it get to me. I don’t feel hurt as such but more just annoyed that her behaviour is making me feel angry and even sometimes doubt myself.

Any advice for how to deal?

One of my colleagues is quite outspoken and I suppose a bit abrupt in her opinions, and dismissive of what others have to say and how they feel. She’s also to an extent, very focused on promoting herself and the work she is doing.

For example, for a current project she has to travel 1.5 hours to get to the work site, every few weeks over a three month period. She has complained about this to who ever will listen and makes it seem like she is going above and beyond to do this project, when in reality a) there’s no obligation for her to take on this project- it could’ve easily been handed to someone else; and b) at least 5 of our colleagues commute long distances every day for work (whereas on average her daily commute is 15 minutes). I find this insensitivity really frustrating.

Another example is during group planning sessions she will give her opinion and is incredibly assertive of what she believes should be done, and doesn’t try and understand where others are coming from when they try voice their opinions, if it differs from her. It’s basically her way is the only way. Unfortunately there’s no accountability in terms of a senior manager being part of the conversations, and I as someone who is soft spoken and an INFJ, don’t know how to speak out against her, partly also because I know she can be quite nasty and forceful.

However it does get understandably frustrating, because it also feels like she undervalues what the team brings and I can also see that her intentions are self serving in terms of airing her efforts but also minimising the work she has to do.

I don’t know if any of that makes sense but I am just seeking advice on how to work with challenging personalities, and how to not let it get to me when it is getting more frustrating but she won’t change

I’m planning an overseas trip through Europe and looking for advice around metformin. I’ll be on 2000 ER and take with dinner. I haven’t had side effects yet luckily but wondering if these can be brought on if my night dinners change? I usually eat at home so it’s easy to control but will mainly be eating in restaurants while travelling

I haven’t been on it long and luckily haven’t had side effects. I know that Metformin doesn’t supress one’s appetite but has anyone found that it has helped reduce your portion size?

I made a really nice meal tonight - was an ometlet mix - only 2 eggs so not a big portion, with some mushrooms and tomatoes. and I got to a point where I couldn’t finish it. I’ve been really good with only having one helping over the last few weeks but to not even be able to finish tonight… felt odd

I increased my dose yesterday and I don’t know if I’m imagining it but my stomach feels more tender? It’s not bad cramping or anything, and so far haven’t had any other issues.. but is this possibly related to the increase in dose or something else??

A have a few work conferences to attend and the company takes care of organising the food for the day. A lot of the time this is sandwiches and wraps.

Is there a snack that you take with you, to have before meals, to try limit the impact of metformin and these meals?

Or what do you say your dietary requirements are when the meals are being organised? Gluten free?

I’ve just started on Metformin- luckily no issues so far. I’m just wondering how long it will take for Metformin to take effect in making me feel fuller quicker/help with reducing my portion sizes?

I’m on 500 ER so far but will be increasing to 1000 this week

We all know how infrequently we find people who we just click with. But how do you navigate not coming across as needy?

I am an INFJ and have an INFJ friend. We hang out maybe every 6 weeks or so, and each time I come away feeling so energised and just wanting more time together. I assume she values our friendship because she doesn’t turn down the opportunity to meet up and always talks non-stop during our time together, but I don’t know how to navigate this kind of hole that I feel in between our time together.

I know that she isn’t a big texter; she has a busy life with her family and work commitments, so how do I fill this void?

Please give me some tips.. I feel tired all the time and can’t bring myself to exercise… what helped getting you started?

Looking for a few options of potential hiking tracks, in or nearby Sydney, that my friend and I could do next week?

Hoping that some tracks may dry out over the weekend but know that there may still be patches of mud along the way.

Any recommendations will be greatly appreciated!

It’s my brothers partners birthday in a few weeks and he is having a big birthday party. I will know no one except the parents and I honestly cannot think of anything worse than going to a big event and spending a night making small talk.

They know that I’m not big on crowds but everytime I say this my family basically don’t have any empathy and jump straight to there being something wrong with me, which I hate cause they just don’t understand me.

Is it better to send my apologies now ahead of time and say I cannot attend, or should I message the morning of and say I’m sick and can’t attend?

My brother also just invited me to another thing in a few weeks and didn’t tell me what it was. I said what happens if I had plans already and his immediate question was- do you really? I actually do. My dad’s response was: cancel them. It makes me feel so disrespected that they doubt my social life or don’t respect my time or understand what energises me and doesn’t

I’m meeting up with a friend and it’s the first time in months that we will be by ourselves. I’m excited because when we are together the conversation goes beyond the shallow catch ups. She’s recently made the decision to remain in a temporary job for a few months, instead of returning to her old role. I don’t want to make assumptions about why she made this decision, instead would really love to delve into her thought processes over the last few weeks. I just don’t know how to word questions or what to ask, to really get through her layers of thinking.

Any suggestions welcome!

We don’t work in the same location but we are part of the same team. I know I am not the only one who finds her difficult to work with. She doesn’t know how to collaborate, has poor communication skills and is generally a very cagey person.

Over the past week we have been collaborating on a project together however her behaviour has really gotten to me. She went ahead and did the project by herself, despite it being something that we were collaborating on as a group. When we met to discuss her ideas and share our own ones, she got defensive when we tried to get her to explain her thinking. At another meeting, she turned up late.. then when we tried to catch her up on what she had missed, she didn’t really listen to the direction we had decided to go in and instead became fixated on her own idea, which was completely disjointed from what we had spoken up the day before and agreed upon in her absence. It’s not the first time. It’s repeated behaviour and I find myself getting really frustrated and angry. I have tried to be assertive with her- in writing obviously- to articulate that she was late and disrespectful, that if we are collaborating it means we all need to be part of the conversation. But she just doesn’t get it, instead coming into another meeting sulking and playing the victim. Shes a 50 year old woman who has excuses for everything but never takes responsibility for her behaviour. I know it’s not just me who gets frustrated- she’s been part of two other teams previously and it’s the same. I feel for my own sanity I need to actually just stop engaging with her. I feel bad because we were such a close knit team and really collaborated well, but since she joined, things have been so different.

Any advice?

I sent a very thoughtful message to an INFJ friend the other day, after she shared some news. I know that she knows that the news would be hard for me, as we will see each other less and we have spoken about our bond before, but I am genuinely happy for her as well.

She knows that I’m someone who feels things deeply and prefers to communicate in writing (also an INFJ). She would’ve known that this message had a lot of thought behind it. But she hasn’t replied to it. I

Sometimes when I send through deeper messages she will send back a heart emoji. But nothing this time. It’s been a few days and she has even responded to a message in a group chat…

What could be the reasons why she hasn’t acknowledged it?

My INFJ friend/colleague is in the process of making a decision to move permanently into a job she has been temporarily doing or to go back to the job she was doing before.

As an INFJ myself, also having been in this situation previously, I have a feeling that she will find it very hard to go back to her original role and won’t be returning to work with me. I am very supportive of her and want her to follow her instincts, but I know that it will be a big adjustment for me as she is someone who just gets me and I love working with her.

I’m looking for some quotes and poems to help me with my emotions. I’m not sure if this is a normal way of INFJ processing, but it’s something that I do, so please share anything you’ve got!

I’m in my mid 30s and haven’t had much experience with dating. I feel like I’m comfortable in my INFJ bubble but do want to meet someone. I really struggle with the dating apps and don’t really get out much to have opportunities to meet someone in real life. I promised myself to try give the dating apps a go and so will try have conversations with people although they never go anywhere and I end up feeling frustrated/lost. Recently I was on the app and came across an old family friend- I haven’t seen him or had anything to do with him in maybe 20 years. We didn’t have a friendship or anything when we were younger- we were very different ages/stages of life. I’m wondering whether I should try match with him, and if I do, how I should proceed with a conversation. I don’t necessarily think that any ring will come of it but because he is familiar it may be easier for me to potentially date, as I am demi-leaning and need that deep connection/fpundation .

Anyone been in a similar situation? How would you start a conversation?

My colleague messaged me this morning to let me know that her mother had passed away. Her mother was in her 70s/80s and had some health issues so it wasn’t a complete surprise for her. I messaged to let her know that I am there for her.

We are not overly close but she is a close friend of one of my close friends. I’ve also experienced the loss of a parent and obviously have INFJ empathy so feel like I want to do something.

What would be appropriate in this situation? Do I message our mutual friend to let her know that I know and to see if she has spoken to our colleague/whether she knows if she is ok? Or do I wait until I see our mutual friend and ask in person?

Do I send something? I’m at a complete loss about what to do but feel heavy.