u/biggestgooser

My company has been hybrid for a while now and I recently switched teams. I went from really hating my job, to really enjoying my role; but I’m now being asked to go in more regularly. I’m not eager to leave and want to make this current role work.

The odds feel stacked against me and I’m not sure what I can do to make it more enjoyable.

1. We hot desk so I can leave anything at my office to make it more personal/comfortable for me

2. Everyone I work with is in another city.

3. I’m a designer and everyone else in my office is not, so I don’t have an obvious reason to collaborate/ask for input on anything.

4. 95% of the employees live in the suburbs and leave early to beat rush hour, so some days the office empties at 3:30.

What are somethings you do to make going in more enjoyable, or should I begin looking for somewhere with better culture?

I invited a close friend to my small wedding and knew she might end up declining due to other travel plans. At first she said no, but then said she’d try to combine it with her pre-planned travel. I follow up as the deadline approached, she said she couldn’t commit. This was a little said but it’s ok and I understand.

Planning continued and I ended up still having spots open past the deadline. Out of the blue she asked for a photo our invite (didn’t send her a physical copy since she said no), and I decided to tell her there was still room in case she could work something out. She didn’t really acknowledge this, but asked me to mail her one.

She gets it and I told her I’d need confirmation on if she was coming or not to adjust plans. She hasn’t spoken to me since.

I know she probably can’t come, her silence has said enough and I’ve continued planning assuming she’s not coming. It’s hurtful that she couldn’t be straight up with me. I’m now confused about how to go forward with this, I know weddings can alter friendships but it’s something you don’t expect.

I have a friend who I invited to my wedding and she hasn’t really given me a straight answer. My wedding is in October in the Italian Alps and we don’t need final counts until end of September. Me and all my guests are from Canada, so pre planning is needed to get there. I know I may have over stepped here and will let her come to me with her answer, but I’m interested in others thoughts on the situation.

My fiancé and I were initially planning on having a very small ceremony with just our immediate family (6 guests). Around February, his sister and partner told us they were no longer able to attend. The package we purchased allowed for up to 10 guests and was non-refundable. After some discussion, we decided to extend the invite to some friends. We knew we might get some nos since it was somewhat short notice.

One of my friends (call her C) said pretty early that she probably wouldn’t be able to come because she was planning a trip with her partner to Scotland. Completely understood and told her I knew there was a chance she’d say no (her and her partner were in this region just last year) but I wanted to extend the invite in case she could come.

A week later, the two of us are on a call with another friend (call her A) who I invited and is coming, and C mentioned she was working out if she could do a combo trip, Scotland and wedding. About a month and a half after this, I follow up asking if she’s made any headway planning and she told us she couldn’t commit. A week or two after this, she tells us they can’t even go to Scotland because they left booking time off from work to the last minute and they won’t have the time approved.

I accepted she wasn’t going to be there, but then she tells me and my fiancé they’re trying to figure out this trip again. I’m confused but figure they’re doing their own thing and she’s still not coming. A couple days after this, she asks for a photo/video of the invites I made to show her sister. I send her some and say, “You know you two are very much still invited.” I also clarify that if they can’t for whatever reason, that’s still alright but the seats are very much still open and we’d love them there. She doesn’t say anything, just hearts the message.

Again, I figure this is her gentle way of telling me no, so I move on. A week later I’m on a call with them and C asked me to bring her a physical invite when I come over in a couple weeks. I tell her I can just mail her one and she’s enthusiastically says, “Yes, mail it to me!” Things seem to be going in the direction of her coming, but then A tells me C was asking her about travelling to a destination A has frequented on the other side of the world.

I’m very confused now; does she want to come and she’s weighing options? Does she not want to come but doesn’t know how to tell me no?

Ciao! My fiancé and I are planning our honeymoon and have been debating a day trip to Cinque Terre while we’re in Florence.

What are the temperatures like? Are there still a lot of things open? What towns would be best to visit?

We’ll be in the area October 27 to October 31.

Grazie mille!