u/but_why_is_it_itchy

Struggling to accept that he’ll never think he was wrong

I know this is dumb to be hung up on. But here I am.

Yesterday was supposed to be our first wedding anniversary. I knew I’d hear from him. I braced for it. But somehow I still wasn’t ready for him to lash out and blame me 100% for our demise and accept zero responsibility for his own actions. He is a narcissist. He was manipulative. He was physically, emotionally, verbally, and sexually abusive in the cruelest ways. In the beginning he used to apologize. By the end, the abuse was always my fault. I guess I hoped with time apart he’d realize some self-blame. But no. Everything was still my fault. I pushed him to be abusive. I rage-baited him to hurt me.

I hate that he still gets under my skin. I hate that it still bothers me that his narrative to himself and his people is so inaccurate. I’m not engaging with him anymore. I’m not arguing. I’ve learned that lesson at least. I just wish I didn’t care.

For now I’m going to try to focus on gratitude and being thankful that my pets and I are out of the worst of it and don’t have to live in fear anymore.

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u/but_why_is_it_itchy — 3 days ago

I know I need help. I’m drowning. I don’t know what I need. I need help cleaning my house but I’m too embarrassed to have anyone see it. I need help being getting out of bed/out of my house. But I don’t want to force anyone to spend time with me. I can’t think of anything else that would help me. I can’t live like this anymore. I’ve been in bed for almost a year. I’m so lost. I know I have good people in my life who would want to help. But I don’t want to take advantage or put them out but actually asking.

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u/but_why_is_it_itchy — 21 days ago