u/cancerouscarbuncle

I’ve been caregiving in some capacity for over 10 years now. However, it really wasn’t until my loved ones started actively dying in the hospital and/or hospice was called in that they actually realized I was a legitimate caregiver. And even then they only realized I a small fraction of what I actually do and the stress I’m under.

It’s as until the words hospice or actively dying are spoken, people can’t actually conceptualize the legitimacy of caregiving.

Has anyone else experienced that?

Is that a common occurrence? It’s a new symptom…or either I’ve noticed it for the first time.

I know I am.

Yesterday she could eat the banana cream pie snack cakes. Today they’re too tough and she just can’t. The teriyaki beef noodles that she loves suddenly taste wrong to her. The ice cream that she eats almost every day tastes like nothing. Tomorrow she will wonder why I’m not giving her her favorites foods. “Well, yesterday you said you didn’t like them anymore…” “No, I didn’t.”

Eat it anyway. Or don’t. I don’t care anymore. I’m tired of constantly having to jump through hoops and constantly come up with new foods she can eat like a revolving turnstile. And that’s just the food!

Her home healthcare team wants to change the designated days for visits. I’ve planned my own healthcare appointments around these designated days and now I’m having to change everything.

It’s selfish but WHEN WILL IT BE ABOUT ME?