u/candygirl00056

I asked for a raise because I do exceptional work and go above and beyond. My case load has increased greatly. I asked for a proportionate raise, as this would require me to spend much more time to accommodate the caseload - I genuinely care about my clients, so if I am handed a caseload, I'd rather spend the time required, rather than rushing through each case. My manager told me that it's not likely I'll get the raise, but that she would have to check. This was a few weeks ago.

After having been told that and waiting without a response, I decided to take my PTO days because I had a feeling they would not give me the raise and I'm mentally checking out at this firm.

I'm beginning to feel like I was undervalued and not appreciated. I do not want to continue working. I'm going through something called "corporate burnout," which I recently read about and I have all the signs, it seems. The thought of work increases my anxiety and I hate my job. A big cause of this feeling was increasing the workload on me exponentially without increasing my raise, which I feel is a reasonable expectation.

So, I'm mentally done here. I can either continue pushing for a raise, but even if I do, I don't know if I want to work with them anymore. OR I can just quit without a back-up (I do not need the money because my partner is the breadwinner and financially supportive). May I have some advice on what is the best way forward?

I'm suffering from severe depression, and I've been a lawyer for about a year. I can't seem to get out of it. I fake being happy, but deep inside, I'm super depressed and burnt out. I don't want to do this work anymore. I absolutely hate it. I fantasize about quitting. I feel like I've lost myself.

I'm a woman and I want to stay at home and be a mother. That's all I want. I don't want to do the corporate world anymore.

Do I quit or hold on? Do I ignore my feelings? Do I push through?

I'm a Muslim woman, recently visited Israel by myself because I'm a solo traveler and love to experience new cultures, really loved my experience. I posted about my experience in another sub (r/TravelIsrael) and many comments were supporting, but the amount of hate I got was also insane. All of the hate comments seemed to be coming from people who have never visited Israel, which is very sad honestly, because a lot of hate stems from pure ignorance, it seems.

I still support Palestinians and want freedom for everyone who is a good individual, but I want to say that I'm now a Zionist, whereas before, I was more of an "anti-Zionist." A lot of my prior beliefs were from social media posts (which, I know, is not good). I also realize that a lot of my prior beliefs were due to ignorance and propaganda and distortion of reality. When I visited Israel, I was surprised. I did not witness an apartheid state, as I was always led to believe Israel was. I was treated well and kindly. I saw IDF soldiers walking around peacefully. I even asked them for directions and they were willing to help civilians. I did not view injustice anywhere. It really felt so safe and I actually saw Muslims living there, as well. There were Muslims and Jews and Christians walking and living amongst one another.

I actually feel like my trip to Israel has made me lean towards Zionism. I was happy to see that Jewish people felt safe in a country to practice their own religion. Sometimes, they may not feel safe to do so outside of Israel. It's fair for Jewish people to have their own state, especially since anti-semitism is rising. Is that so bad? But also, I did not feel like Israelis treated non-Jews as any less than them. I did all the touristy things, ordered food, walked the streets, observed people living peacefully with each other. When I recounted my honest experience, I still was met with so much hate from the "pro-Palestine" crowd and it really opened my eyes to the brainwashing. I was surprised that they did not want to hear my actual and lived experience of what Israel really is like. For example, there are Muslims living in Israel who have businesses and livelihoods (which I did not previously know because that part is never shared with the "pro-Palestine" audience). I asked Muslims living in Israel if they liked it, and they all answered that they love living in Israel, which surprised me. Also, the Muslims living in Israel talked about how afraid they were of Iran firing missiles at them and about having to go to a nearby shelter. (I mention this because I've seen some "pro-Palestine" influencers also support Iran, but seem to ignore the realities of what it means to innocent civilians on the ground in Israel.) The hate comments on my previous post accused me of spreading propaganda or being part of Mossad, while I was really just sharing my experience of having actually traveled to Israel. It seems that when someone has a certain view of something, they are not willing to listen and learn.

So, it makes me think that: how can we get along with each other if no one is really willing to hear the other side and get to know their lived experiences?

Anyways, I just wanted to say that Israel is truly a wonderful country. I wish to be back, as I know it is rich in history and culture. I hope there is peace for Israel, and I hope the world will open their hearts.

I'm turning 30, never found a husband, and I am scared I never will. I have gone to Umrah twice to pray for a spouse, but it has not happened yet.

I don't know if I care so much about a husband anymore, but I truly want to be a mother. I know I'm on a ticking biological clock, and I'm not sure what to do. I don't want to freeze my eggs, etc. (I've gotten this suggestion before, so that is why I am throwing this out there.)

Is it too late for me to be a mother? 😞

I'm a newer attorney and I was talking to a client, but the client's son got on the phone and started yelling at me. I got off the phone because I have never felt so attacked, and I bawled my eyes out and sobbed. The client criticized me, my personality, etc. It was a case that is not even mine, but I took the call to assist the client, as another attorney had worked on the case. I've never felt so uncared for as a young attorney, and I truly want to leave the firm for the way I feel like I've been thrown to the sharks. Plus, my firm increases my workload with no pay increase and no bonus. I'm sick and tired of it. I feel like I dread waking up in the mornings.

I asked for a 40% increase in my salary in proportionate to the added jurisdictions and increased caseload. (I've worked just under a year.)

I'm very stressed by this new caseload increase. The manager kind of talked to me about it and said they don't usually increase compensation by that much. However, I'm also taking into account what they'd have to pay for the additional licenses, as opposed to paying a salary to one attorney licensed in multiple jurisdictions. What do you think?

Am I being unreasonable?

EDIT - just to clarify, I was only responsible for cases in one jurisdiction for the firm. They told me that increased caseload is an expectation when I asked about an increase and made me feel bad.