u/carnuatus

Thoughts?

You're just being intersexist and kind of gross. Be happy you weren't forcefully reassigned your sex, sometimes faultily in a way that causes lifelong pain and discomfort. The reason the number of intersex individuals is so low is not only because of underestimation but because most are forcibly assigned one or the other at birth, thereby enforcing the (false and faulty) sex binary.

Also, being intersex wouldn't necessarily make you "more male," or whatever. There are so so many different variations, and some indeed fall under "genitals different than expected," rather than masculinizing or feminizing. Not to mention, if you think your doctor already doesn't understand your body because you are trans and/or on hormones, have even more fun when you're trans AND intersex. Because doctors are so woefully informed on the differences that can be present that you have to explain to them like they are toddlers. Because doctors, in many cases, just think it means you have a penis/testes and vagina or whatever, when that's usually NOT the case.

I genuinely thought something was wrong with me since puberty and it turns out I'm just intersex, something I found out at 33. It did not magically make me "more male," as an intersex trans man. It's mostly just uncomfortable, unpleasant. And, oh yeah, a medical condition.

That and real tired of the AMAB/AFAB/AXAB language perisex trans people (and atp perisex people in general), have coopted to recreate a gender/sex dichotomy when the way they use it (afab = have uterus/vagina), (amab = penis/scrotum/testes), etc, is woefully incorrect.

Being intersex does not make you less clockable, less prone to violence or less prone to erasure. If anything, it makes you MORE prone to those things. Please stop trying to commodify the suffering of your fellow queers. (Though, not all intersex individuals identify as queer, but I personally do, for both being intersex, trans, and otherwise queer.)

Sincerely,

An intersex trans man

I'm tired.

When we do not. I know it is a distinct corner or corners of the internet but it's so deeply aggravating. I love my transfem friends I know irl and anyone I consider friends. But it's so annoying whenever the topic of transmascs comes up, we get accused of "sidelining the conversation," when they literally sideline it by bringing up something they're offended about, when someone is discussing something in good faith. This woman literally just pulled out of her butt this long, long, bulleted list of things that make trans women more vulnerable, when... Considering the things she was mentioning, trans men and mascs are KNOWN to be excluded from these studies, polls, etc. So the slant of trans women and fems being more victimized and blatantly wrong. We are both equally victimized in different ways. Also, the refusal of some trans fems to accept that is so deeply frustrating. Trans men face misogyny. ESPECIALLY medical misogyny. Period. But they do not want to hear it.

I told her that "we are all faggots in the eyes of the state." She took that as me saying "All lives matter," when the phrases are not at all synonymous and comparing the oppression of trans men vs trans women is not anywhere in the realm of white vs black people. Not even close in the level of disparity or violence both face. She genuinely had in her little list that "when did you last know of a trans man who was verbally harassed because he was trans." I don't know dude, I am one and most of my friends are. Never mind that Elliot Page was JUST talking about being harassed in California, no less. And she brought up trans fems being more likely to be sexually assaulted, as if it's not a known problem for trans mascs. And the v-coding thing. Like, yes, trans men do not face that, but to act as if people do not covet us in a perverse way for our natal genitals is asinine.

Never mind, I believe this all started from a few trans fems in a cptsd sub (of all places) trying to dogpile a young trans man for daring to call people forcibly feminizing trans men (or even young men, period) as a forcefem kink and because it's associated with trans women, that it could not possibly be construed any other way. They even said something along the lines of forcefem kink being a kink means it cannot be applied non-consensually. Plenty of cis men, who I have personally met, have forcefem kinks re: trans men, and I've had to discuss with other transmen/mascs about a certain guy who was doing just that and creeping on transmascs because of his weird kink. There is a consensuality problem in the kink/bdsm community, period. Something being a kink, unfortunately, does not mean it cannot be practiced without consent. But y'know, trans women own it, so none of the rest of us plebs can touch it. 😒