u/cat_snots

Hello! Like the title says, I am in the process of applying to re-enter the nursing program that I withdrew from in winter of 2025. I had a mental health meltdown and hit a wall. I had the option to interview for admittance into the next cohort but was not ready. I also missed the one year deadline to petition for reinstatement by a few months, and am meeting with a counselor to see what my options are.

I guess I’m just looking for stories or experiences of anyone else who left the same program they’re trying to get back into. I know that my grades and all that are fine, and the only shitty thing may be that I might have to do the whole application process again.

Man, I’m really going through it lately. A year ago I was kicking ass in my nursing program, and then this disorder reared up and I hit a wall. I had to withdraw, and after much soul searching have realized that I can’t do something like nursing. I know there are plenty of professionals in here who make it work, but I don’t think I’m able to. That hurts.

So now I’m 50 years old with no skills, an associates’ degree in liberal arts (which isn’t nothing) and a 12 year gap on my resume. I don’t know what to do from here. I had made the last three years of my life about getting into the nursing program and doing that.

I’m so down, guys. I know myself enough to know that the next step are the SI. I have kids, and I don’t want to leave them with this sort of trauma. But I really just don’t know what to do, and am feeling really worthless. I’ve reached out to my psych and have an appt this afternoon. But damn, we all know meds take a sec to kick in. I’ve been here before and know that the next two weeks or so are going to be awful.

Thanks to everyone for being here. I don’t have anyone IRL who gets it, and having sympathetic people in my corner is everything.

Ok. So my daughter is inpatient for suicidal thoughts. She actually had a date and method planned, but thank everything out there that she came to me first. She was having a rough time and really needed to see me, so I of course went up to visit with her. The problem here is that it was also my son’s birthday and things took a lot longer with my daughter than I thought.

I get home and my husband was sulking like he always does. Turns out, he thinks that I always make everything about me, I hide behind my diagnosis, and I need to just get a job and contribute to the household. This is the kicker, he went into the hospital for chest pains about a year ago. This was around the time when I was so mentally fucked up that I had to leave my nursing program. I started having chest pains too, from the anxiety, and the dr wanted mine checked out too. My husband accused me of…IDK, upstaging him? It was nuts, but I’m still crying about it.

And before you say it, I know I need to get out. I’m working on getting a job where I can support myself, which is what my nursing degree would have provided. I don’t know what I need here. Just some friends I guess. I felt so low last night that I had some SI myself.

Like it says, I have had to discontinue two meds because of price. I had to switch insurance and one went up to $2500/month and the other is now $150/month. This is with discount cards too. My new pcp won’t touch psych meds, and all the psychiatrists on my new insurance are all full. So I can’t even get someone to maybe switch me to something cheaper. I’m getting scared. I am pretty stable on my cocktail, and I don’t know what is going to happen now.

Just wanted to vent, I know there are so many in worse places than I, and that makes me feel like a shit for even complaining. But it is what it is.

So, around this time a year ago, I was in nursing school, had an absolutely terrible BP2 blowout and ended up quitting my program. By the time I was stable, I realized that there was no way I could handle nursing school, much less actual nursing itself. I ended up switching my major to liberal arts and just graduated. I didn’t want my credits to go to waste. I was looking at pictures from the graduation and saw some from the RN students’ pinning ceremony from my cohort.

This has me feeling really ish. I’m so proud of them, and really really wish I had been able to handle it. I just needed to get this out, I really hate BP2 sometimes.

Anyone else forget to breathe when they’re anxious? I’m going through it right now and I almost forget to breathe and then I’ll gasp. This all sucks.