u/citymatryoshka

I don't know what my personality would actually be best suited to in practice so I'm going to describe what I'm like in detail. Please suggest anything at all.

I feel trapped in an office job. I currently work in one and I start to get uncomfortable behind a desk if I'm there for more than four hours. If I got to leave an office at 1 or 2PM instead of 5PM and do something active and "be free" I'd probably be good. But I am antsy and unhappy here. I know this isn't quite right.

I feel trapped coming into the office five days a week as well. A 9-1PM, 3-4 times a week would be ideal in terms of the amount of sitting and being trapped at my desk I can handle.

I might be able to handle more office time if my job actually involved some change and excitement. I am an admin assistant. Boring, mentally unstimulating, nothing new, sometimes I'm bs-ing and twiddling my thumbs over here. Maybe if I got to do something challenging, interesting, new etc every day I could handle an office. I don't know what that something might be though. Make decisions, problem-solve, work with people...I don't know. I just know I don't get to use my intelligence and abilities very well here.

I am an ambivert. Not a full blown extrovert but I can chat with people. I have been described as dynamic, friendly, kind/nice, not shy, calm, agreeable. Definitely need my alone time too and love being introspective and around my familiar folk, but would probably hate being too solitary and ruminating all day.

I love hanging out in a group, but especially if the group is full of like-minded, cool folk. I'm not going to feel good around people I don't feel like I can be my authentic self around. That's boring to me. I can get drained in unfamiliar environments, but if I'm partying with a familiar group of people I like, I'll probably get quite comfortable. I like one-on-one convos with good friends too. I will not be the organizer of a party or a group outing, that is exhausting and out of my comfort zone to me.

I'm quick witted, a good writer, literary, sharp, funny, into pop culture, have a curated taste in things (or I try to). I like social psychology. I've done comedy as a hobby and have a natural knack for it.

At school I was kind of good at everything, though least drawn to and maybe weakest at math. Academic excellence came easily to me. Mental health got in the way sometimes (like getting into my top choice schools), unfortunately. But really, nothing was beyond my grasp (part of the problem with trying to choose a career is that I know that I can be good in a lot of things).

I hated being "stuck" in high school. The lack of control of where to go, when I got to eat, how long I was there, etc. College and its flexibility was away more enjoyable for me for this reason. (See: don't like being stuck in an office).

I got English/Creative Writing majors in university I don't use. I think writing is hard for me to stick to because it's too lonely, even though I'm good at it.

Even though I was known as a "reader" in school and people associate me with reading, Imma be honest, I don't read that much, lol. I think I get bored too easily even though I make an effort to read. I'll read a few books a year. LOVE a good book, but I just need to be forced to finish it, like in school, lol.

I would like to make enough money to not just get by but also get to travel. Another factor is maybe having a family in the future, but that's a big "maybe" for me (I don't think I'd want kids unless I'm making a comfortable amount of money).

I also want to be able to comfortably afford a bit of a pricier lifestyle than the one I have now. Not much more expensive, but I want to be able to afford haircuts and blonding my hair twice a year without worrying about it :/ I'd like to be able to afford getting my nails done semi-regularly, buying the skincare I want without worrying, same for good clothes. I don't need much, but I need more than what I'm making now. And again, it's mostly because of travel. I want to see places and have the money to see them and I currently can only afford about one trip a year, if that. Also I want to pay off my student loans quicker and just have a security net in case of an emergency.

I like visual aesthetics and have some interest in photography. I like taking photos of things and people in action/candids...never professionally, not often, but I've enjoyed capturing people in snapshots on my iPhone in the past. Sometimes walking down the street I'll see a perfect moment I want to capture: someone lighting a cigarette, construction workers on a break pouring honey-colored beer into clear plastic cups... I'm too shy to take pics of strangers though, lol. But the impulse is there! Love editing/coloring photos too. (I haven't done this in a while but historically I've enjoyed this).

The lack of structure and direction in some of these creative pursuits, and the "starving artist" thing, scare me. I'm kind of tired. Some part of me just wants to live a chill, calm life where I can enjoy the little things every day and just be with people I love and am close to. To live near nature and just relaaax. Another part of me wants to make the most of my potential and is ready to work for something.

I'm a bit anxiety-prone (working on it). I did not enjoy working a fast-paced job as a barista at Starbucks.

I'm messy/don't have the patience or focus to keep a tidy environment (working on it).

In short: I'm everywhere.

I just want a job where I can actually use my intelligence and abilities and, you know, get fulfillment out of it.

I know this was a lot...any suggestions?

I saw MAC Lip Glass recommended but I do not want to spend $24 on a lip gloss... I feel like there's gotta be a cheaper dupe. Please share your faves. I am looking for preferably a clear lip gloss, or something that's got a pink tint (but isn't that opaque, milky pink). Thank you!

Edit: seems like Essence lip gloss is the most recommended so that's what I'll be getting, thank you everyone!

Hello! I had a bit of a rough improv practice recently. I think I generally struggle with anxiety and confidence, but some days, I'm more than fine -- I'm perfectly calm and confident and do well.

The last two practices I had, I had just come back from a trip where I got to relax and work out some of my anxiety, and my mind was settled and calm. Maybe it's because I'm back to regular life, but I feel off again. I came into practice in a weird, insecure mood the other day. I was nervous about the practice on my way there, and on stage, I was just a confused mess. Nothing in particular was bothering me; it was almost like a physiological state where my brain was just not working right, and my body felt it too. Everything I was saying felt awkward and wrong, stilted, etc. I didn't feel comfortable doing anything. I know other people could see that, which made me feel more awkward. It's like the things I was saying in scenes were almost random, badly-timed, counterintuitive. You know when uncertainty just colors every single decision you make? On stage or off? I tried to push through and just fake confidence but that didn't work well.

This might be beyond the scope of a simple mentality adjustment and might be a mental health thing (I'm in therapy already), but I was wondering if any of you get like this, or have these two "modes" you operate in where one version is a calm, confident you, and another day, it's like you're a different person and nothing feels right. It's like the simplicity of humor and improv just escapes you and your mind overcomplicates everything, and you sort of "freeze" because you don't know what to do, or feel a lot of pressure about what to say next.

It's interesting because it affects my "listening" too. In one scene, I just kind of missed what was happening -- I was trying to listen, but I was confused and couldn't latch on to the general idea or "game" because I was anxious. I had no choice but to participate in this particular exercise, though, so when I came on stage I just did my best, even though it didn't fit the vibe at all.

Is there anything I can fall back on in moments like this? Anything to help me snap out of it? Should I lay low and only speak up when I have to?

Thank you!

Tw: I describe what I visualize and mention some crashes.

The 45 minutes or so of descent time can turn into an excruciatingly long experience of anxiety for me. I hate it because I’ve been told takeoffs and landings are the most dangerous part of the flight. The recent accidents that have happened (DC helicopter crash, LaGaurdia fire truck collision) have all been during landing time. I’m horrified of the idea that I was SO close to making it/surviving, but we crash.

The feeling of the plane’s descent can feel scary, some pilots seem to drop elevation a bit more steeply than others? I dislike when there seem to be anxious or fidgety passengers around too, looking out the windows, some of them gripping the seat etc. I keep visualization the plane crashing into something just as we’re minutes from landing because I imagine there is more traffic closer to the ground.

Sometimes, at the end, when we land, I have this feeling of: oh thank God. I survived. I smile to myself in relief like I actually survived a dangerous gamble.

I’m getting much better at handling my flight anxiety overall but landings seem to be the most anxiety-inducing for me. Any tips?