Feeling Lost
Hey there,
I’ve been practicing/performing improv non-stop since May of 2024. During that time I had a pretty quick rise within my community; cast in many shows (including a MainStage in my first year), won a lot of competitive things, and delved head first in to my community. I came out on the other side with a pretty successful troupe including some other “wunderkins” of my class. We’ve begun running weekly shows that have had relative success and growing, we’ve helped carve a new space for the community and I feel like I should happier than I am, but each week I feel more and more like I’m not.
I feel like this is the least I’ve understood Improv in my whole time of doing it. I used to be able to make people laugh with most decisions I made, but at some point that became my obsession and I think it’s ruining me a little. Now I know I shouldn’t prioritize being funny, but like I said, my troupe has some solid members including one person in particular who can seemingly do no wrong. To the point, that they’re pretty much the star of every scene. So if I don’t get a laugh during a show, or at least some moment of note, I feel as if I’ve not contributed anything and I was more a support character for this persons show.
It’s really messed with my psyche quite a bit and it’s odd, when I go to a jam, or if I’m in a one off show where I perform with people I barely know, it’ll all come back to me. But then I’m with my troupe again *poof* my improv ability is gone.
I can’t help but feel that their might be some toxic underlying reasons, i’m having trouble fully deciphering it, as I am in it, so if anyone has any advice or perspective I’d really like to hear it because like I said in the title, I just feel lost.