Trust your intuition
Hi everyone,
I’m on the other side with a 4 week old girl (we thought it was a boy especially everyone chiming in that based on the myth/old wives tale of how my belly was shaped).
My partner and I decided that we wanted a home birth. We live outside of the US. We’re in our late 30s, FTparents. When we were interviewing midwives and our birth team, one midwife gave me this sense of calm during our zoom call.
I remember repeatedly exhaling deeply after her answers to many of our questions. If we went with her, it meant moving to a birth Airbnb 4 hours away and waiting for the birth but we’d be near her, her birth team, and preferred hospitals.
My partner wasn’t keen to the idea bc he was familiar with where we lived, concerned with finances and honestly had some fearful resistance.
I understood some of it and also thought the only way I’d be able to have my preferred postpartum doula was birthing where we already were. That was my assumption.
Anyways, I reflect back to that moment and remembered my intuition being so quiet but clear. However, fear explained it away.
My labor and birth turned out to be what one could call traumatic but I guess it was part of my story and something I was meant to experience. (I can share my birth story another time, possibly).
Now in postpartum, I’ve experienced a lot of grief, regret and resentment because there were signs that the doctor we went with missed that the midwife said were telltale signs that she wouldn’t have missed.
FYI I was transferred to the hospital, vaginal birth, unmedicated. Healthy babygirl and I’m on the mend after what felt like my entire body would break in half.
Anyways, I came here to say — Birthing people, Mommas, ladies: trust your intuition. 💕