u/cs_____question1031

It’s not uncommon to find stories in America of people losing access to their healthcare when they become sick due to no fault of their own and going into medical debt. People seem oddly indifferent to this, like it will never happen to them

First of all, people should be mad at what it even represents. If you are only valued for your productivity and output, and discarded when you’re not productive, you are a farm animal. You’re like a race horse that’s gonna get put down if he breaks his leg more than you are a member of society

Secondly, if you just put a coat of paint on it, you’d think it’s heavy handed fiction. Just last year they released that movie no other choice where losing his job was the inciting incident to the entire movie because of how much he stood to lose as a result

What’s most fucked up is that this is what companies want. Healthcare is expensive, so why do companies offer it, and why do they fight against attempts to make affordable public healthcare? Because they want to use your health as leverage against you. That’s how low they’ll go. All of them. They truly resent you

I don’t really know how to describe it, but they remind me of those characters in occult horror short stories where they go insane and start worshipping the monster. Kinda like willem dafoes character in that Nosferatu movie

I’m a software engineer. I went into the field because I think software has the potential to do a lot of great things

But nowadays it feels like every company is just… honestly kind of a scam. Most of the people who came into tech did it because they saw the opportunity to own digital infrastructure and seek rent on it. They basically just want to be digital landlords

Every product just fuckin steals your data or tries to steal your time. Every company seems like their goal is to take over the entire world for some reason. The people running these companies are very, very odd people who seem like they’ve never been told no in their lives (if they do get told no, they just fire the person saying it)

Products aren’t even trying to be good anymore at this point. Corporate just has some arbitrary metrics to hit and engineers do that and nothing more. Everything is so ruthlessly efficient that it becomes bland and stock and has no character, like it all came out of the same factory

It feels like for the past 10 years, tech has been in a weird space where they keep releasing these very odd things that would only appeal to bros. Crypto, blockchain, NFTs, LLMs… the general vibe of all of them is 🤑🤑🤑 and nothing else of substance

No, I don’t want whatever bullshit tech you’re selling me cause it’s probably loaded with spyware and backdoors. Your vibe coded app is probably riddled with security holes, and you probably fired all the engineers who should be there to fix it when shit goes wrong. No thanks

“Buy” doesn’t even mean “buy” anymore. You’re just renting it and they can take it from you whenever they want. This has already happened to people. Hey if I can’t have it indefinitely after paying the full purchase price… don’t label the button “buy”. The options are “rent” or “lease”

Idk how we took something as miraculous as the internet, connecting people from across the world, and made it this bad just to make a few guys rich. So sad that it ended up this way. Either way, I’m trying to use less and less tech every day. Physical journals, physical media, if it can be taken from me digitally, I don’t want it

I think my mom has BPD and it’s really straining all of her close relationships. She had one traumatic event recently that sort of triggered that abandonment complex (where someone did in fact cut her off entirely), and she’s never been quite the same since. Shes very erratic and hypervigilant

I did manage to get her to sign up for therapy, but it seems to be making things worse. I notice that she seems to see the world through a different lens than others. When she tells stories about things, she seems to embellish things or turn personal inference into facts. She leaves out a lot of context. She might say someone literally said something, when in fact it’s something she felt like they were saying through subtext. If you ask anyone else to describe the experience, it’s usually far different from their perspective

It sort of feels like she’s interpreting things through this lens of fear, trying to figure out when the other shoe will drop and this person will abandon her. This in turn puts so much emotional pressure on the other person that it often overburdens them and causes them to snap at her. She then takes this snippiness as proof that they hate her, when they’re really just sort of overwhelmed

Her erratic behaviors make people feel on edge. At the last few family visits, she decided to get on a plane and leave without telling anyone because of one thing someone said. This makes it very difficult for people to interact with her cause they’re afraid of something like this

From my perspective, it seems like she has a gaping infected wound in her mental health that’s going septic. We can’t treat it because you even come close to touching it, and she’ll scream out in pain. We’re not sure how we can treat it. It’s straining relationships heavily (like… devastatingly so)

She’s older, so if I bring up that I’m concerned about her mental health, she reductively dumbs it down to “so you think I’m crazy?”. I find this incredibly frustrating. What I see is that infected wound. I just can’t seem to impart that nuance to her without it getting boiled down to me calling her crazy 😕

Hoping for any advice here. I also don’t “know” she has BPD, but it seems a good match so I want an expert to potentially confirm it. I have autism and it helped me a lot just to know I have it, so maybe the same will happen for her?