u/darthvadette

I’m hoping to start collecting Kendra Scott again, especially since I completely missed the Disney Princess Elisa pendant collection and am in love with all of them 😭

I usually buy directly from Kendra Scott, but since a lot of the pieces I’m looking for are retired and no longer available on their website or in stores, I’ve been searching on Poshmark, Mercari, Depop, and eBay instead but honestly getting a little overwhelmed. There are so many listings from sellers with huge inventories of only Kendra Scott (or sometimes Kendra Scott plus premium brands like Alo, etc.) selling for way below retail, so it makes me a little hesitant and kinda raises a 🚩.

I feel like I can usually spot listings that make me more confident, like photos of the actual item, proof of purchase, or sellers who just happen to be cleaning out their own closets rather than listing hundreds of the same type of jewelry.

I’ve also noticed some online boutiques still have certain retired pieces listed around the original MSRP. Are those generally authorized retailers with leftover inventory, or is that something to be cautious about too?

Is there any trusted Facebook groups, resale communities, boutiques, or individual sellers you’d recommend? Or is there a better place than the usual resale apps? I’d love to find authentic discontinued pieces without spending hours trying to figure out what’s legitimate. I see that there’s a BST thread on here but it seems a bit inactive.

Would love to hear where you all have had the best luck!

I’ve been reading this subreddit for months, and so many of your stories have helped me get to this point. You all helped me realize that what I was experiencing wasn’t normal, and that there could actually be peace on the other side of all of this.

Ironically, he always told me this subreddit was “extreme” and that the stories here didn’t apply to us, but the more I read, the more I saw pieces of my own experience reflected back at me.

But now that the day is here, a random Monday in June that will likely change the course of my life (hopefully for the better), I’m feeling everything. I’m scared because I don’t know what the future holds. I’m sad because no one starts a relationship hoping it will end this way. I’m nervous because this has been my normal for so long that stepping into the unknown feels overwhelming.

At the same time, I feel hopeful. Almost excited. Like I can finally see freedom peeking through the clouds. It’s such a strange mix of emotions. One minute I feel empowered and strong. The next minute I’m questioning everything and wondering if I’m making a mistake. Then I look around at the boxes and realize this is really happening.

I know many of you have had to leave with children involved, and I have so much respect for the strength that takes. I don’t have children, but my dog is my baby. Taking him out of this environment and giving both of us a chance at a calmer, happier life is one of the things helping me stay strong right now.

I know this isn’t the end of the journey. I’ll still have to come back for a lot of my belongings to put into storage, stay with family for a while, and figure out what comes next. I don’t even have my next place lined up yet. For the first time in over 2 years I’m choosing myself before I have every answer, and that’s both terrifying and freeing. I’m just taking the leap and trusting that I’ll figure it out one step at a time (with the help of my Lexapro and Ativan as well that I was prescribed due to this relationship, lol).

Having some encouragement from people who have already walked this road or are in the midst of it would be extremely beneficial right now ❤️‍🩹

Were you scared too? Did you feel like you were making the biggest mistake of your life right before you left? When did you start feeling peace? When did your nervous system start to calm, even if it was 1%?

Please tell me your stories. Tell me what life looked like six months later. Tell me what surprised you. Tell me what got better. Tell me about the moment you realized you were finally okay. I could really use some hope and reminders that it’s okay to be scared and still move forward anyway.

And thank you all. Truly. This brave community has made me feel so much less alone. Sending love to every person here who’s still gathering the courage, in the middle of leaving, or already rebuilding on the other side. Sending so much love to all of you beautiful, courageous, worthy people ❤️

I’m struggling with what I’ve called a Dr. Jekyll / Mr. Hyde dynamic with my partner throughout the entirety of our relationship and I genuinely don’t know what’s reality anymore.

When he’s in “Dr. Jekyll” mode, he is incredibly self-aware. He acknowledges almost everything. He can explain his triggers, his defensiveness, his shame, how he hurts me, why his behavior is unacceptable, and he genuinely seems like he understands and wants to change. Then something triggers him.

It’s like a switch flips. I’ve always described it as watching his face physically morph/change. He becomes cold, rigid, stoic. His posture stiffens particularly in the shoulders, his hands come together like a typical movie villain, his tone is stale and the energy is incredibly hostile. The empathy disappears and suddenly everything he acknowledged before is negated.

We are currently approaching what would be our third breakup. We’ve been together 2 years, lived together 1. I’m at the point where I have a storage unit, a plan to stay with family, and I feel like I’m finally preparing to leave for good this time. I feel so calm when I’m not around him but I’m stuck in the loop.

Our psychiatrist (we’re both patients of) and his own therapist (who has validated my experience and truly finally has made me feel understood as I join his sessions with my boyfriend) have suggested not making drastic changes immediately and trying things like separate bedrooms first. But my issue is sleeping separately doesn’t stop the abuse.

The other day I recorded a 30 minute video during one of his episodes because I was crying on the floor while being berated and I needed proof for my future self. I literally made a message begging future me not to fall for the remorse cycle again.

What’s confusing is that the remorse and self-awareness feel genuine. I don’t think he intentionally wants to be this way. It almost feels like he recognizes the “loose screw” but can’t actually keep it tightened once he’s triggered.

I suppose my question is: Have any of you experienced someone like this who was truly capable of long-term change? True, actual, sustained behavioral change. Or am I holding onto potential because I’m trauma bonded and need to accept that understanding ≠ capability?

I’m struggling with what I’ve called a Dr. Jekyll / Mr. Hyde dynamic with my partner throughout the entirety of our relationship and I genuinely don’t know what’s reality anymore.

When he’s in “Dr. Jekyll” mode, he is incredibly self-aware. He acknowledges almost everything. He can explain his triggers, his defensiveness, his shame, how he hurts me, why his behavior is unacceptable, and he genuinely seems like he understands and wants to change. Then something triggers him.

It’s like a switch flips. I’ve always described it as watching his face physically morph/change. He becomes cold, rigid, stoic. His posture stiffens particularly in the shoulders, his hands come together like a typical movie villain, his tone is stale and the energy is incredibly hostile. The empathy disappears and suddenly everything he acknowledged before is negated.

We are currently approaching what would be our third breakup. We’ve been together 2 years, lived together 1. I’m at the point where I have a storage unit, a plan to stay with family, and I feel like I’m finally preparing to leave for good this time. I feel so calm when I’m not around him but I’m stuck in the loop.

Our psychiatrist (we’re both patients of) and his own therapist (who has validated my experience and truly finally has made me feel understood as I join his sessions with my boyfriend) have suggested not making drastic changes immediately and trying things like separate bedrooms first. But my issue is sleeping separately doesn’t stop the abuse.

The other day I recorded a 30 minute video during one of his episodes because I was crying on the floor while being berated and I needed proof for my future self. I literally made a message begging future me not to fall for the remorse cycle again.

What’s confusing is that the remorse and self-awareness feel genuine. I don’t think he intentionally wants to be this way. It almost feels like he recognizes the “loose screw” but can’t actually keep it tightened once he’s triggered.

I suppose my question is: Have any of you experienced someone like this who was truly capable of long-term change? True, actual, sustained behavioral change. Or am I holding onto potential because I’m trauma bonded and need to accept that understanding ≠ capability?