u/eatingchipsrightnow

Do other people get upset by "Italian jokes"/stereotypes?

Just wanted to see if I'm overreacting (genuinely).

I never bother anyone who says these things, but it does actually hurt me when someone asks about my background, I say I'm Italian (Italian American) and they start making jokes or have a negative reaction. A few months ago I also was asked to do an event showcasing some Italian American foods and how to make them, which I happily did and shared some of my own family's recipes, I was honored to do it. A good friend made fun of it as I was talking about planning it, laughing and saying "no one cares that you're Italian". Casual friends or people I've met also say stuff like I should look like a guido, mimic Italian accents to me, mob jokes, pizza jokes, I expect it and sometimes play into it even if I don't like it. To be clear I also don't just tell everyone I'm Italian which IMO would be obnoxious, but people ask because of my name, I think I've brought it up on my own like 3 times in the last few years.

Another part of it is that mostly the only Italian people I know are my family, and I grew up in/live in now an area with almost no Italian Americans. I'm not part of any communal culture. My family raised me to have a lot of pride in being Southern Italian but that part of my identity feels kind of touchy. I barely mention it with anyone and when I do, most of the time there's a dismissive or ignorant reaction and it's happened so much.

To be clear I don't count this as racial discrimination, it feels xenophobic or maybe just rude? I feel like I shouldn't make it a big deal or it shouldn't hurt as much as it does but tbh I hate it. Maybe I need to develop my own strength of identity more or grow a thicker skin. ...Thoughts?

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u/eatingchipsrightnow — 13 days ago
▲ 63 r/23andme

White American "Norwegian-Italian" Results / GEDmatch + photo!

Put in quotes since that's what I was told when I was a kid.. technically true but interesting to see the whole story (And the Scottish was a surprise)

u/eatingchipsrightnow — 21 days ago

White American results w/ composition, journey, timeline - any detectives?

Grew up being told I was Norwegian/Italian -- turns out it's more complicated.. the Scottish I had had no idea about, but found Ulster Scots in the family tree so I'm not surprised (edit: completely forgot there was also much more recent Scottish ancestry I found in my tree, my family just didn't tell me).

I was most surprised to see the Finnish, French (??), Andalusian/Asturian/Castilian, Czech/Hungarian/Slovak/Polish, and the really low English as a white American. The Cypriot was also a surprise but I was expecting some North African/West Asian admixture (Southern Italy -- though not 100% sure it's from there).

I'm mainly wondering, does anyone have insight into these results? I'm trying to trace my family tree without either of my parents' results, and am really interested in which ancestries came from where.

One side of the family came from Norway to Minnesota, with some early Canadian settlers that moved to Minnesota.

The other side is Italian arriving to the East Coast, Southwestern Germany to the Midwest, and some "old stock" Americans traveling from Virginia to Appalachia and then to Missouri (they follow the same timeline and path of Melungeons, I don't know if my results necessarily suggest that).

Thanks for reading!

u/eatingchipsrightnow — 2 months ago