Opinion vs Fact
My friend (F 30, audhd) and I (NB 33, autism ocd) have been friends for a while. We are neighbours as well as her being married to my best friend (M 30).
We very frequently watch tv or movies together the three of us (best friend, friend, and I). Recently a problem has been arising and making me more and more angry as time goes on with no way that it has really gotten resolved. While my best friend and I have very similar if not identical tastes in movies and tv, my friend has very different tastes to us. Think HBO antihero focused shows versus network tv detective shows respectively.
Very often we will watch shows/movies/documentaries where I have a different opinion on or an experience that makes me relate to the media in a different way from her and we will get into a cycle of what I call "arguing opinions". We have established repeatedly over the years that arguing opinions will do nothing but make both of us angry and frustrated with one another.
I've tried to back off and have definitely stopped giving my real opinion on the things that she enjoys, but she has repeatedly continued arguing that the things that I enjoy are bad, stupid, or poorly written. She will constantly argue that it is a fact that her shows are just superior and will talk about how they are better written or that because her preferred type of show is much more mass appealing that it makes it superior. Sometimes she will simply watch something that I enjoyed and say "that made me uncomfortable and it was unnecessary to show that and therefore it's bad writing".
I will often get sucked into the arguments against my better judgement because I feel like she is not understanding what I am trying to say when I give my opinion (which I will repeatedly say is my opinion not a fact). She will often continuously argue because she states that she is arguing the facts about the structure, the writing, or other things about the shows that are objective fact rather than personal tastes. In the end I will just bite my tongue, let her know that I'm done with the conversation, and we will move on to another topic.
Only to repeat the cycle when we watch a new piece of media together. Every. Single. Time.
I am wracking my brain of how to escape this endless cycle of arguing opinions without getting angry, hurt, and cruel. I am tired of this cycle and I don't want to just stop watching things with my friends because I do enjoy sharing the things I enjoy with people, but I don't particularly like feeling on trial every time I share something that my friend doesn't like.
EDIT: accidentally swapped our autisms oops