Update: 7 years later
Someone saw my original post read on TikTok and asked for an update. (If anyone can share the TikTok with me, I’m super curious).
Original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/s/7MMwoL8cJw
Unfortunately, things did not go so well for me and my husband. Poly continued to be challenging for us. Finding a long-term partner was tough for husband. Women generally wanted more than he could provide.
There were good times and fun experiences. We both learned a lot.
The nail in the coffin was when my relationship ended with my boyfriend. After being together a year, I was very sad when we broke up - and that really bothered my husband. He was hurt that I loved the other guy. Things went downhill quickly as he was not thrilled with how things continued to go for him.
It was messy and hard, and my hubby and I ended up separating about 8 months after I made this original post.
I’ve now been remarried for four years with a monogamous partner. Another long-term poly friend of mine also ended up divorcing over similar circumstances and is now remarried and monogamous. My ex is also remarried happily and is in a monogamous relationship.
Non-monogamy taught me a lot and it helped me become a good communicator. In the end I think everything worked out for the best. I’ve very satisfied and happy in my current relationship dynamic. If my husband and I divorced, I would still be open to non-monogamy. I believe it is possible to do this well as long as everyone works hard to communicate. My guess is maybe it’s harder for people who’ve been monogamous and married a long time to open up than to go into a relationship that’s open from the start. That was my experience anyway.
Best of luck to all of y’all. ❤️