There is only so many times I can walk around the Century City mall, DT Culver City, Abbott Kinney, 3rd Street Promenade. I am getting so bored of the same places walking my baby!
Where else do you recommend? Looking for something that also has things to do (like window shop, stop for coffee) and obviously be paved and stroller friendly.
It’s the Sandy Fire, I assume and not a fire close by?
I have been with my husband almost 10 years, married for 4 and we have a baby boy who is 9M. I thought we had discussed everything before having a baby. We had every conversation possible - parenting styles, financial stability before even trying for baby, what kind of support I wanted freshly PP, if we were doing cloth vs disposable diapers. Felt like we literally discussed everything! But now I notice how unambitious he is. He has no desire to want to leave this apartment. He would be perfectly content living here forever. I am not. I am desperate for a house with a yard. I hate the idea of my kid having friends over here while they all have yards and houses. I feel so much shame. This isnt how I planned my life to go. I never thought of myself having a family in an apartment. I always imagined a house. But I can’t do it alone, I make good money but it’s not enough with just my paycheck to afford a mortgage. And I have told him this, but he has no desire to look for a better paying job or ask for a promotion. I have a promotion lined up at work and even applying to higher paying roles. And his complete lack ambition to want to get a house is making me so resentful. I hate that I feel this way. I genuinely thought I was in a perfect relationship. He is so kind and funny and takes care of the baby more than I do because I have a demanding job. But this one thing is slowing eating away at me. I hate how expensive everything is, if this had been even 5 years ago we could easily afford a house. But not anymore. I daydream of divorcing him and finding a husband that does make more money and wants more of his life. I’m not going to but I just dream of it.
I have started seeing a therapist for PPD. I don’t sleep much because the baby is an awful sleeper and I feel so much guilt when I sleep in the other room. I know my mental health is struggling and I’m so burnt out from working and not sleeping properly. I know this isn’t the end of the world and what a silly thing to dwell on when I am in such a privileged situation to begin with. But I just needed to get this off my chest because I think of it so freaking often.
Ok thank you for reading. 🫶