u/frankie110304

LOCATION: Indiana my parents are being overprotective and controlling I am 22 I am living at home for the summer between college. In college I am very calm and really am excited abt everything. I have recently been a car accident so my parents have been driving me to work when they feel like it. I was supposed to go on a trip with my bf and his family to Michigan. I have been dating my bf for 6 years and his family treats me as one of their own. His parents think my home is toxic. My bf was going to pick me up this morning and take me but my dad said I would have consequences and I would feel them for decades and that I am not allowed to go. I ubered to my house I stay at during school to get away and have some peace but my dad wants to show up and get me when I would like to be alone. I am 22 and he tells me he will call our family friend who is a police officer to track me down and file a missing person report when I had turned off my location and he told me they would show up and detain me through text messages… I am unsure what to do but I am 22 and I don’t like the situation I am currently in. I have thought about purchasing a flight or lyft to see bf but my parents can see my financials… What if I just go? Should I leave my location here and leave early tomorrow?

So my parents are being overprotective and controlling I am 22 I am living at home for the summer. I have recently been a car accident so my parents have been driving me to work when they feel like it. I was supposed to go on a trip with my bf and his family. I have been dating my bf for 6 years and his family treats me as one of their own. His parents think my home is toxic and they think he’s grooming me. My bf was going to pick me up this morning and take me but my dad said I would have consequences and I would feel them for decades and that I am not allowed to go. I ubered to my house I stay at during school to get away and have some peace but my dad wants to show up and get me when I would like to be alone. I am 22 and he tells me he will call our family friend who is a police officer to track me down and file a missing person report when I had turned off my location and he told me they would show up and detain me through text messages… I am unsure what to do but I am 22 and I don’t like the situation I am currently in Do I get the uber or lyft to go do I book a flight to go need advice!

My boyfriend and his family invited me on their family vacation. I am 22 and work 2 jobs in the summer and go to school. I asked and tried to reason but my dad is busy with work so I texted him to tell him and his response was “Please stop. I won’t engage in this. And if you have to keep asking about this — and also will continue to ask for financial support from us well beyond your means — then it should provide you with the obvious answer and you would be best to respect our perspective and stance. As I said, I will not respond to any messages going forward on this topic.”

I don’t know what to do I just want to go, and not be punished. I want to prioritize my happiness and make memories with my boyfriend of 6 years and his family. My therapist thinks I should go I just want to be happy.

Follow up: My parents refuse to talk to me about it or give me a reason. Recently my friend went in a trip with her boyfriend and I told them and my mom said “This may be ok for other people/families, it is not ok for you. I won’t send additional texts.” I am so annoyed and just mentally drained and feel so worthless. I’m tired of being treated like this when I consistently work my ass off and do as they say. I regret choosing a longer program in school and still having school and not having the freedom to just move away.

My parents are manipulative and emotionally abusive. I really can’t take it much longer. Any advice?

My boyfriend and his family invited me on their family vacation. I am 22 and work 2 jobs in the summer and go to school. I asked and tried to reason but my dad is busy with work so I texted him to tell him and his response was “Please stop. I won’t engage in this. And if you have to keep asking about this — and also will continue to ask for financial support from us well beyond your means — then it should provide you with the obvious answer and you would be best to respect our perspective and stance. As I said, I will not respond to any messages going forward on this topic.”

I don’t know what to do I just want to go, and not be punished. I want to prioritize my happiness and make memories with my boyfriend of 6 years and his family. My therapist thinks I should go I just want to be happy. My parents refuse to talk to me about it or give me a reason. Recently my friend went in a trip with her boyfriend and I told them and my mom said “This may be ok for other people/families, it is not ok for you. I won’t send additional texts.” I am so annoyed and just mentally drained and feel so worthless. I’m tired of being treated like this when I consistently work my ass off and do as they say. I regret choosing a longer program in school and still having school and not having the freedom to just move away.

I recently messed things up for the rest of my summer pretty bad. I got in a car accident. Luckily the other person is ok and so am I, very thankful no one is hurt. My car is not drivable been hard to get to work. My boyfriend and his family have been very sweet and have offered to drive me and pay for ubers, I have been doing it on my own through ubers and sometimes my parents are able to drive me. My dad is pretty upset with me at the moment which is pretty understandable and I know I screwed up. I feel like I have lost every ounce of independence ever. Not sure if I will get this car back or if it is totaled

Lastly, my dad is going out of town 3-4 days after I leave to a softball event. Same state different city, I am just sorta frustrated right now and not sure what to do. Super overwhelmed and feel extremely guilty and unsure what to do. I have time off work but I do not have a car so I can’t pick up shifts or can’t drive anywhere. If anyone has suggestions on what to do I would appreciate it. I would love a break from work and a break from home and an opportunity for happiness but without people getting mad or having to hide my happiness…

My boyfriend and his family invited me on their family vacation. I am 22 and work 2 jobs in the summer and go to school. I asked and tried to reason but my dad is busy with work so I texted him to tell him and his response was “Please stop. I won’t engage in this. And if you have to keep asking about this — and also will continue to ask for financial support from us well beyond your means — then it should provide you with the obvious answer and you would be best to respect our perspective and stance. As I said, I will not respond to any messages going forward on this topic.”

I don’t know what to do I just want to go, and not be punished. I want to prioritize my happiness and make memories with my boyfriend of 6 years and his family. My therapist thinks I should go I just want to be happy.

Follow up: My parents refuse to talk to me about it or give me a reason. Recently my friend went in a trip with her boyfriend and I told them and my mom said “This may be ok for other people/families, it is not ok for you. I won’t send additional texts.” I am so annoyed and just mentally drained and feel so worthless. I’m tired of being treated like this when I consistently work my ass off and do as they say. I regret choosing a longer program in school and still having school and not having the freedom to just move away.

My parents are manipulative and emotionally abusive. I really can’t take it much longer

My boyfriend and his family invited me on their family vacation. I am 22 and work 2 jobs in the summer and go to school. I asked and tried to reason but my dad is busy with work so I texted him to tell him and his response was “Please stop. I won’t engage in this. And if you have to keep asking about this — and also will continue to ask for financial support from us well beyond your means — then it should provide you with the obvious answer and you would be best to respect our perspective and stance. As I said, I will not respond to any messages going forward on this topic.”

I don’t know what to do I just want to go, and not be punished. I want to prioritize my happiness and make memories with my boyfriend of 6 years and his family.

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 6 years. We started dating in high school and are now both in college — I’m 22 and in a professional program, but I still live at home during summers while working a summer job.

The past couple summers, his family has invited me on their family vacation, and every time my parents immediately shut the idea down. This year, my boyfriend brought it up again and his dad even personally texted me inviting me, which honestly meant a lot to me. I really want to go because I want to make memories with him and his family, especially since we’ve been together for so long and I genuinely see a future with him.

For context, my dad is not fond of my boyfriend, despite the fact that we’ve been together nearly 6 years and I fully plan on marrying him eventually. We’ve gone on smaller trips before with friends from our university, but I’ve always avoided telling my parents it was technically a couples trip because it just creates tension.

At this point, I feel stuck between respecting my parents while also feeling like I’m an adult trying to build a life and future with someone I love. My boyfriend has even said that if moving in together, traveling, and doing life together requires a ring for my family to take it seriously, then that’s what it will have to be.

Has anyone else dealt with parents who struggle with letting go or accepting a long-term relationship? How did you navigate it without completely damaging the relationship with your family? Does anyone have any ideas on how I tell my parents (I already put the request for time off from work)