u/fruitsuperstar

Talking with my psychiatrist I explained my daily thoughts, which he described as psychosis. To me, psychosis is so severe I’m in the hospital. It’s not my daily paranoia. According to him there’s a difference between having psychosis and being actively in psychosis. I dunno. Am I just insane 100% of the time? I feel normal. Maybe I don’t know what normal is.

I don’t think I can handle it between the paranoia and especially the negative symptoms. I’m also in a depressive episode. I’ve applied for disability. I’m hoping it comes through and I can focus more on my healing. Please let this be the right decision. Part of me hates myself for quitting. Part of me knows it isn’t worth my mental health.

I’m working a part time entry level job and cannot remember to complete 2 tasks in a row. How fucking dumb am I. I’m so pissed off and exhausted.

I started a new job which requires me to wear an ear piece, lots of people talking. I am unmedicated at the moment but scheduled an appointment tomorrow with psychiatrist. Can I sustain this job or should I quit?