u/goatqueen420

I posted in another community but I wanted to post here and hopefully get some more perspectives.

This is a bit complicated and I will try to explain as best I can. I wasnt sure how much context to add but I feel it is relevant so please bare with me. Names and such have been changed for anonymity.

I do not go by my legal name, I chose my name a long time ago and it really means quite a lot to me. It is not a common name (for the sake of this post) I go by the name Iris Aphrodite. It is spoken like a compound name (i.e. MaryJane)

I met my now partner about 2 years ago and we started a bit of an intense situationship.

After about 6-8 months life changes in my life led to me putting some distance between us so we parted ways.

After about a year we reconnected. During our first conversation she told me how she's began to publicly transition. I was suprised but so very very happy for her. I asked if she had a preferred name that she had chosen as I only knew her by her deadname at that point.

She said "I chose the name Aphrodite, I just noticed thats your name. I hope thats okay haha"

I was kind of caught off gaurd by the way she said it as she has only ever known me as Iris Aphrodite so I'm not sure how she could have "just noticed"

Honestly I was so happy for her and I wanted to be supportive so I kind of just pushed aside my suprise and only expressed support.

We began talking more and she tells me the story of how she apparently chose her name.

She used to visit her grandmother with dementia in the memory care quite frequently. Every day she would bring a list of names that she was considering. She would ask her grandmother to pick a name from the list. Every day she chose the name Aphrodite.

It didnt really bother me at first....

After all, who am I to dictate a name? The name was here before me and will be here after I am gone. The way she told the story was almost like an afterthought. I want to find the story heartwarming, I want to belive her but much to my own surprise I don't, like my gut is throwing flags.

I am kind of flummoxed as to why my name would be an option on the list...

I pushed aside my mixed feelings and sort of hoped they would fade with time but as time has gone on the opposite has happened. I have only ever told her I am okay with it because what else am I supposed to say? Am I wrong for feeling some type of way? Like a piece of myself has been stolen and someone else is wearing it...its gotten to the point where I am considering changing my name.

I feel like I should feel flattered but instead I feel kind of offended? The name I chose was very much an ode to the struggles I survived, a way to pay homage to them and it feels strange seeing that taken from me in a way.

Is it weird that she chose my name?

Am I an Overracting for being so troubled about this?

This is a bit complicated and I will try to explain as best I can. I wasnt sure how much context to add but I feel it is relevant so please bare with me. Names and such have been changed for anonymity.

I am cis but I do not go by my legal name, I chose my name a long time ago and it really means quite a lot to me. It is not a common name (for the sake of this post) I go by the name Iris Aphrodite. It is spoken like a compound name (i.e. MaryJane)

I met my now partner about 2 years ago. We met before they transitioned and started a bit of an intense situationship.

After about 6-8 months life changes in my life led to me putting some distance between us so we parted ways.

After about a year we reconnected. During our first conversation she told me how she's began to publicly transition. I was suprised but so very very happy for her. I asked if she had a preferred name that she had chosen as I only knew her by her deadname at that point.

She said "I chose the name Aphrodite, I just noticed thats your name. I hope thats okay haha"

I was kind of caught off gaurd by the way she said it as she has only ever known me as Iris Aphrodite so I'm not sure how she could have "just noticed"

Honestly I was so happy for her and I wanted to be supportive so I kind of just pushed aside my suprise and only expressed support.

We began talking more and she tells me the story of how she apparently chose her name.

She used to visit her grandmother with dementia in the memory care quite frequently. Every day she would bring a list of names that she was considering. She would ask her grandmother to pick a name from the list. Every day she chose the name Aphrodite.

It didnt really bother me at first....

After all, who am I to dictate a name? The name was here before me and will be here after I am gone.

I am kind of flummoxed as to why my name would be an option on the list...

I pushed aside my mixed feelings and sort of hoped they would fade with time but as time has gone on the opposite has happened. I have only ever told her I am okay with it because what else am I supposed to say? Am I wrong for feeling some type of way? Like a piece of myself has been stolen and someone else is wearing it...its gotten to the point where I am considering changing my name.

I feel like I should feel flattered but instead I feel kind of offended? The name I chose was very much an ode to the struggles I survived, a way to pay homage to them.

Is it weird that she chose my name?

Am I overreacting and being an asshole for being so troubled about this?

*Edited for accuracy