u/happydazexx

FTM. My baby just turned a month (wow). And I know everyone says it’ll get better. And I know it does. And I know it’s different for everyone. But when?

My baby currently is in the phase where we only want contact naps. And I know one day I’ll miss them but it’s hard to do anything with baby losing their mind and screaming so much they almost stop breathing ? And it just breaks my heart and my spirit a bit. But, a girl has to eat and pee and shower.

Also, maybe just struggling a bit mentally which I’m sure everyone deals with some crazy emotions ?
Like, when my baby is screaming and crying and I’ve tried all the things to calm them down and it’s not working (and if it’s been happening on and off all day) I feel like I’m failing my baby and I’m failing as a mom. Is that a ‘normal’ postpartum feeling ? My husband is worried that I feel that way. And I feel so bad that my husband and is worrying about me. Which I feel like adds to some of the mental load ? Like, I had moments where I feel like I’m failing as a mother and then my husband worrying has me feeling like I’m failing as a wife also maybe kinda ??

And my husband is fantastic. Honestly truly. He’s not doing or saying anything that’s making me feel that way or anything. I think it’s just my own mental issue I mean, Idk what I would do or how I would survive these trenches without him.

However, these trenches have been rough. And my husband did say we might just be one and done (which we wanted 2-3 kids originally) just because he said he never hears anything good about the baby. Now I’m not sitting around talking smack about my baby. Or at least not purposefully. I think I just more so try to give him updates throughout the day and usually it is after something happens (like we only want to sleep on mom. If we’re not on mom we’re screaming bloody murder) but to me that an update versus ‘we’re sleeping soundly like a perfect little angel’ and I’m aware I should/could be giving updates like that. But in my mind those aren’t updates really ? Like, he isn’t doing anything but sleeping ? So when I change his diaper and he pees all over himself I’ll let my husband know. Because that’s something that has occurred. But maybe that’s unfair.

But all of that rambling to ask when do things start getting significantly better ? Im trying to take it day by day but that light at the end of the tunnel seems pretty far away

First time mom here and I just am looking for reassurance or advice or any tips tricks anything that might help.

My little guy is three weeks old and I just feel like I’m in the deepest of trenches right now. I know (and hope) it gets better. Just right now I feel like I’m failing.

I’ve read online that sometimes between 2 to 4 weeks babies will go through a growth spurt and I’m hoping that this is just what this is. I just feel like if we’re awake we’re screaming crying and nothing I do seems to fix it for longer than five minutes. Nursing ? Unlatching and crying or we nursed for 20 minutes and are crying five minutes later. Dirty diaper ? Screaming bloody murder the whole change and for 5-10 minutes after the clean diaper is on. Burping and keeping him upright to help with gas for 10 minutes or so afterwards. He only wants to sleep on me (which I do love the baby cuddles. Just can’t get anything done otherwise).

Idk. I just hate the screaming crying. He sounds so horse and raspy and I just feel like I’m letting him down. I know the world is new to him and he’s new to it. This is new for all of us. So I try to remember that but I just can’t help but get upset over the screaming crying fits and just looking for something that might be helpful.

He’s not a huge binky/pacifier guy at all. We try. Sometimes it helps and other times I think we’re tooo far gone in our fit to be consoled by that

FTM here and maybe no one will be able to give me an answer/advice but I am 2 weeks post c section. And with warm weather approaching for me I was just curious when you started wearing jeans (or in this case Jean shorts) ? I’m still bleeding and wearing pads with regular underwear, but imagine once bleeding stops (when does it actually???) I will be back in my usual underwear (thong, tmi ? Sorry) and just anxious I guess about the denim fabric against incision/scar ? (How long does it take the skin to heal ? Slightly worried about ripping incision open if it’s not scarred over ???)