Step daughter colored on herself before her first day of pre school, and her mom says it’s my fault.
I 34m been living with my girlfriend 33f for a year now, she has two kids. A 5 year old boy and an almost 3 year old girl. Today was her daughter’s first day of preschool, it was a hectic morning with her mom making sure that her outfit and hair were perfect for her to go today.
I was in the kitchen making her son a boat out of paper, and doing the dishes. Her daughter was on the couch watching TV while mom was in the bathroom. I noticed her daughter was being quiet so I went over to check on her, she was like 10 feet away. I saw a crayola washable marker on the couch next to her and asked if she touched it. Then I saw her legs were covered in marker.
I brought her to her mom to get cleaned up and her mom freaked out on me that I should have been watching her instead of doing the dishes. I didn’t know where she got the marker from and her mom was in the bathroom for two minutes before I saw she drew on herself. I got an earful about how I don’t do enough to help her with the kids, that she has to do everything. She got all the marker off her legs and we went to go drop her off at preschool.
Then she was upset that her daughter hugged me goodbye last before we left. We got back home and I finished up cleaning the kitchen and doing some chores. After an hour she had to leave to go to an appointment. Before she left she again reiterated to me that I need to watch the kids more closely when she’s not around. Saying she’s not the only one that notices I’m not picking up on things I miss. (I think she means her mom) That she’s got nearly 6 years of parenting experience and needs more from me.
I really don’t know what to do, I’m constantly criticized for not helping with the kids enough. A year ago I got dropped head first into being a stepdad, without any appreciation of the sacrifices I’ve made to be one. I literally help whenever and wherever I can. I clean, I cook, I pay most of the bills, I buy most of the groceries, I help with bedtime, I help with her pets, I go to all school events, I help with laundry but nothing I do is ever enough. I just feel like I’m being used as a replacement dad because their father isn’t in their lives. I can never catch a break because I’m always under scrutiny.