Everyone says “flavor is free”, but what if you just can’t decide what flavor you want to work with. Me and the boys worked long and hard in the lab, and in between sessions we made this table you can roll on to make decisions even easier! Enjoy
every time i have a thought about my story, no matter how insignificant, i have to add it to the board here as a dot. each dot represents a document full of my worldbuilding very important plot structure and it only looks disorganized from the outside. i assure you i know where everything is in here just give me a sec and i can find it okay?
Recently one of my players came to me and said “hey, you know I love gardening in real life, and I want to bring that into the game”
I said, “of course, what do you want to play? a druid or something?”
he laughed and said, “no, I want my human fighter to have a specialized shovel he uses as a weapon. I was thinking we could use a polearm damage block or another weapon you feel is more appropriate.”
I could feel my blood beginning boiling right then and there, guys. My ears got hot.
“Shovels aren’t weapons. Best I can do is an improvised weapon. 1d4 + STR. Take it or leave it.”
He just frowned and left. The other players disagree with me but I don’t see any of those cretins running the game, now do I? A shovel is a gardening implement. Not a weapon of war. Who are they kidding? I’m taking this game very seriously.
But lo and behold he’s told everyone about my decision and now my wife is leaving me and I got fired from my job over this. Am I crazy? Surely I’m not in the wrong here!
I've always struggled to keep my focus when it comes to jerking and get easily distracted, but I know in the past there's been a few things that have helped.
On my first attempt at NNN maaaany years ago when I was still a teen I spent most of the month on AIM (giving away how long ago it was now) with other jerkers doing edge seshs and it was super helpful for me to have that short time crunch to jerk as much as possible without thinking too much and have other people doing it too.
I've also been in plenty of forum RP forums over the years and I find that with collaborative method of jerking back and forth with someone, especially when it's the right someone I click with, it's easy to jerk loads and really develop a storyline.
And yet leave me to my own devices and I don't have so much luck. I struggle to get it out, to motivate myself to actually get myself there... I get distracted too easily (and end up on reddit jerk subs instead of in my goon chamber...). Perhaps I'm just bad at holding myself accountable.
Does anyone else find that they jerk better when it involves other people in some way? Either jerking sprints, or a back and forth collaborative method. Or do you prefer the solitude of jerking alone? And does anyone who does like jerking with others know of any places where edge seshs are a regular thing, or other little challenges to encourage jerking?
so im trying to run a game where we have a classic “final boss is god” situation but i decided to have all the bosses along the way be gods as well
right now the party is only level 5 and i dont want to tpk them just yet (waiting until at least level 8) so how much do i need to nerf the god so a level 5 party can reasonably take them on?
and dont tell me some silly nonsense like “have then fight a cultist or emissary of the god instead”. it HAS to be the god. that’s the point. if they don’t literally fight actual gods every step of the way i may as well throw the whole campaign away now
Or both? Plenty of groups lean into narrative because that's their joy. Some lean in because combat feels like homework. Those look identical from the outside but come from very different places. Where do you land?
I don’t think I’ve seen anyone discuss this detail, and I am curious to hear what others may think about this.
While the reveal of what “Endacopia” actually meant is striking, I am looking to focus on the seal on the left hand page. It looked familiar to me so I flipped open the Lesser Key of Solomon to check if any of the seals there matched and sure enough, it is the seal of a demon lord known as Sitri.
This is an intriguing detail to me as looking into it, Sitri’s whole deal involves invoking carnal desire in another person (making them want to bone you, getting naked, etc). I am struggling to connect this to the Surgeon’s perspective and what he would be invoking Sitri for. I’m inclined to believe Andyland selected this demon’s seal specifically, and didn’t choose one at random just for the spooky vibe.
What do you all think?
Does anyone else feel it? A drone at the back of your head. An itch that eludes your fingertips. It keeps you up at night, unsure if you’re imagining it or if you just haven’t found the source. Break off a piece of your soul and turn it into pie and eat it. That’s what I do. Turn your characters into pie. The flavor doesn’t matter. Eat up slop boy. Tastes good, doesn’t it? Bake your stupid pies. Who can relate haha am I right guys?
guys?
I am making a new character, a tabaxi rogue thief. How do they learn how to pick locks and stuff? is there like a seminar or a masterclass they all take or what
also do paladins have to kiss their oath in a real church or will any ordained minister suffice?
saw this at an antique store but I hesitated because I am not sure if it is compatible with newer models of Chess. Will this cause any issues? My old board broke during an incident I’d rather not talk about.
I finally got around to reading the 2024 rules and was extremely disappointed by the section about alignment. It’s barely changed! Where does WOTC get off masquerading as the arbiters of objective morality? Morality is not black and white, and the alignment system is obsolete.
Everyone is the hero of their own story, so why would my character define themselves as anything other than lawful good? It’s definitely not a metatextual element meant for the players and GM to contextualize the characters and monsters in a rich tapestry of the Forgotten Realms (Or Greyhawk or whatever if you’re a real dork) as a struggle between the forces of Good, Evil, Chaos and Order. My lawful good paladin can justify any action in the name of good. My chaotic evil sorlock can be nice sometimes if the person is fuckable. LET ME PLAY MY BLORBO GAME AND STOP ASKING ME IF I KNOW WHAT THE CATEGORICAL IMPERATIVE MEANS! IMMANUEL KANT IS A GROGNARD CHUD
thank you in advance for agreeing with me and validating my feelings
Clickbait title I know.BEFORE YOU DOWNVOTE, please consider the points I am about to make:
Finding the right system is hard. Everyone recommends something different, and there’s no single resource that clearly compares RPGs and explains what they’re actually like to play. To learn a new game, I have to dig through Reddit threads, forums, reviews, and YouTube videos just to figure out which games could work. I’m trying to PLAY dnd not get a freakin PhD here!
The rules are often inaccessible. Even when a game is free, you may have to hunt down or buy the rules before you can start playing. If you Google an RPG’s rules and the first result is not a link to the actual rules (not a download page or a DriveThruRPG sample), then that is one of the main deterrents to trying the RPG. It should be easier for people to actually get their hands on a copy of the rules. There’s basically no reason I would ever share my documents or books with my players. They are cheap as hell and SOMEONE (looking at you Mat) already stole my copies of Hasbro’s Wizards of the Coast’s Dungeons and Dragons 5th Edition (2014) so I had to spend another $150 replacing them.
After all that effort, you still have to convince your friends to try it. And you may not even have friends to play with and might just be a casual RPG enjoyer. Learning a new system is already a time investment, and it’s hard to justify when there’s a good chance you won’t find anyone to play with. There’s just no way. Even my mom doesn’t answer my texts anymore.
The biggest barrier to trying new RPGs is the amount of time and effort required before you ever get a game to the table. If people want others to branch out beyond D&D, they need to stop pretending the onboarding process is fine and start making the resources a hell of a lot more accessible. Probably if the rules were presented in pictograms so I wouldn’t have to spend so much mental energy actually reading a book.
**TL;DR:** Other systems are too hard to learn, not because the rules are harder, but because the process of learning the rules is a pain.
just what the title says. if RuPaul played 5e what spells are on that list?
Viscous Mockery, perhaps?
especially when they are devils but they ain’t no angels either? looking for good words to call *these people* for my homebrew setting to really spice it up.
Each face of these d20s have 3 results that spin in a triforce shape, making for 60 results instead of 20! The white d20 of Good has more high results, and the red d20 of Evil has more bad results. I even added some faces that aren’t numbers at all just to get a little silly with it.
You know you wanna add these to your dice collection. You’ll never have enough dice. I’m sure you’re already thinking of exactly how you’re going to implement these, aren’t you? It’s so simple.
Thank you. buy now
i am playing a monk and i really want to play as an ooze. while reading the class feats I realized that it could be an issue that I don’t have hands, or arms and legs for that matter.
can I make temporary ooze hands to punch things? what other appendages could I make if so? can an ooze have a functional dick and balls? that part is unrelated but I felt like asking.
if I can’t be a monk my follow up is can I still be a bard or something if I don’t have a mouth or hands thanks
I think Mr. Beast would be a warlock
Blippi would be a bard
Bob the Builder is an artificer
Mike Myers’ Cat in the Hat is a Sorcerer
Shrek is Fighter
who else?
im sick and tired of it all
“roll for this” “give me a bullshit check” “what’s your passive perception?”
fucj you
if you are making your players roll you are literally gatekeeping the game behind luck. you are a bad person and I hate you. I’m going to break into your house and eat all your dice you absolute garbage person.
hint: I have no idea what I’m doing
there’s also other restrictions I am putting on myself like there can’t be any voiced fricatives of velar r’s. How the hell do you guys name things?
Frank contracted and relaxed his leg muscle groups with a steady frequency to move each foot forward one at a time. Each step was approximately twenty inches in front of the step prior. He arrived at his destination, a refrigerator unit with a black exterior, six feet eight inches tall, handles set on the left side. Frank placed each foot underneath his shoulders, twenty one inches apart. He raised his left hand and placed his index, thumb, and middle finger on the handle and applied half a pound of force to pull the door towards him. The retinas of his eyes absorbed the light therein, everything from 380 to 780 nanometers, which is all visible light.
His eyes focused. There was no more milk inside the refrigerator. Holding his exact position in space, Frank flexed muscles in his neck to vibrate his vocal cords while pushing air through his lungs and mouth via the diaphragm. This emitted a prolonged sound at 120 Hz from his mouth. This sound wave spread through the 860 square foot apartment to reach the ears of Frank’s wife.
“Honey, are we out of milk?”