u/joomommyhappy

That's almost cutting the trip in half!

The options are:

• Occam's razor: The trip was always scheduled to be 17 days, and Larry just lied, to pitifully try to make herself and the kids 13 days more Spanish. We'll know it was this if she references this trip going forward as them having spent "a month" or "(the month of) July" there.

• Her parents and/or her brother and SIL had had it with her histrionic bullshit, and told her it was time to go. Not that they control the island, and I'm sure Larry and the kids weren't even staying with them, but if the purpose was to spend time with the family, i.e. video and photo ops for social media, and if they weren't playing along, and it's obvious that they weren't, I could see her getting out of dodge. Then again, I could easily see her stubbornly spite-staying, too.

• Larry was freaked out by how much Alex was enjoying his Larry and the kids-free summer, and had to race back to make his life miserable again.

• It was just way more work for Larry, even with invisible nannies, and she threw in the towel.

It's interesting to note that on the two occasions where extended time with the kids was involved, things were cut short.

Alex supposedly cut the filming of their reality show short by WEEKS, and the show was just him hanging out with his wife and kids. And if you think back, he was almost always just with Larry, and almost never with the kids. iirc, it was just that one totally organic 🙄 arts and crafts thing at that park, and the "welcome back from your manslaughter trial!" moment in front of the Hamptons house, where he shook his oldest son's hand. As you do.

And now this trip, where Larry was flying "solo" 🙄 with the kids, gets cut almost in half.

I'm sensing a theme.

reddit, your thoughts?

my theory: she's looking for Jeremy and his wife to take in the youngest six kids, or as many as they're willing to.

Larry's got Tinseltown dreams. She's looking for a fresh start. The six youngest kids are getting in the way of that, and bogging her down. Not that she's an actual mom, but she kind of has to pretend to be while they're all living under the same roof.

But with them out of the way, all of that would go out the window. She would be free and clear to pursue whatever and whenever, with no restraints.

Also, it puts the "Larry and her brother lived 6 months in the States/6 months in Spain, each year for the first 12 years of their education" lie she made Alex tell in a different light. She was priming the pump. Greasing the skids. Counting her chickens. Ok, not that last one, but you know what I'm saying.

She's looking to spin it like "I want to pass on the TRADITION of multi-cultural, inclusive inclusivity to my kids.".

"and her brother"

Why include the brother in the lie? Because she's trying to dump the kids onto him, in Spain, that's why! In her warped pea-brain, what could be more fitting, poetic, or just?

She's not dumping her kids onto her family; she's a Goddamn saint for giving them the same opportunity she had. Only with them, it would be real, and not just in her imagination.

In that warped pea-brain of hers, I think she's angling for anything Jeremy and her SIL, or even her parents, would be willing to do. And if she's doing that, she's probably dangling things, as well, to sweeten the pot.

"Ok, how about this; you take the youngest 3, 9 months out of the year, and it's a cool $250,000 per year for yous; do we have a deal or do we have a deal? (slides Yunior to their side of the table) You need bigger digs? We can help with that. A nanny? No problemo. You wanna talk turkey? Let's talk turkey!"

There would be incentives. Real estate could be involved. Would Jeremy and his wife take in a couple of Alex and Larry's kids for a bigger house in a nicer neighborhood?

(shrugs)

Also, even if she can't get The Full Monty, Larry could be operating from the mindset that just being able to ship off, say, 2-3 kids for the summer would be a win. This isn't a binary thing.

pepinos, your thoughts?

/u/purple-obligation-14 /u/ok-cress-6205

This is an interesting little wrinkle. Check the date. I thought he was filming that Netflix show in July, yet this is smack dab in the middle of it.

https://imginn.com/p/DaNuEqIubAE/

if that doesn't work........

https://ibb.co/DPGNZk4J

reddit, your thoughts? I need all my freaks in effect for this one.

Thank you.

So Alex got himself a fancy new Netflix gig, filming (in Vegas?) in July. It sounds like he'll be away for a decent chunk of time.

So what's a super-mami to do?

Single parent summer?

Does she try to book something, too, and get out of dodge herself?

Another Hamptons summer in The House That Couldn't Be Sold?

I'm of the belief that she's not merely indifferent to her children, but is actively avoiding them, "they're cramping my style!" style. She's realized that this motherhood thing isn't for her, and is looking to spread her wings, and, if her recent scarecrow photo shoot is any indicator, her legs.

I think she either is or will be seriously irked she's getting "stuck" with the kids solo for at least the second half of the summer, and will somehow try to girl boss out of it.

But threading that needle won't be easy, especially since the one thing we all know she won't do is get off social media.

Obviously, Alex doesn't do much on the parental front, but with him being on location, she can't even lie or imply that he does. No 10-minute pop-ins for Instagram. No nothing but Larry.

So what say you, reddit?

Please put on your Nostradamus caps and offer up your best predictions.

Thank you.

I don't want any foolish answers. Otherwise, don't answer.

There was a handy medical chart someone posted here a while back, with various conditions and the thresholds for each one. Based on our research, the chart determined that she's a high-functioning imbecile. Like maybe on a good day, she'd sort the cashoos and not put them back in the container of trail mix.

reddit, your thoughts?