u/krukako

Problem/Goal:
Need your advice and reassurance because this is my first heartbreak. I want to know if what I’m experiencing is normal and if anyone else has gone through the same thing.
Context:
It’s been almost 2 weeks since our breakup, and napansin ko na every morning paggising ko, sobrang bigat ng feeling. Hindi naman ako umiiyak, pero may weird feeling sa tiyan ko na hindi ko ma-explain. Parang may knot or pit sa stomach ko, tapos parang kinakabahan ako agad pagkagising.
Ang first instinct ko rin is i-check agad yung phone ko, kahit alam kong wala naman akong ine-expect na message. Parang automatic siyang ginagawa ng katawan ko.
Unlike the first 2 days after the breakup na halos hindi talaga ako makatulog, okay na yung sleep ko ngayon. Nakakatulog na ako agad sa gabi. Ang problem lang is once na magising ako sa umaga, hindi na ako makatulog ulit dahil andun na agad yung heavy feeling sa tiyan at parang anxiety.
The weird part is habang tumatagal yung araw, especially pagdating ng gabi, okay naman ako. Nakakatawa ako, nakakapaglaro, nakakapag-scroll, and minsan feeling ko tanggap ko na. Then the next morning, babalik na naman yung same feeling.
Since first heartbreak ko ’to, hindi ko alam kung normal ba ‘tong ganito or if it’s because sobrang dysregulated pa ng nervous system ko after everything that happened.
Questions:
Normal ba na mornings lang talaga yung pinakamahirap after a breakup?
May naka-experience rin ba ng heavy feeling sa tiyan or parang anxious agad pagkagising?
Gaano katagal bago naging okay ulit yung mornings niyo?
Any advice on what helped you regulate your nervous system and move forward?

Thank you po sa mga sasagot!🫶

Problem/Goal:
Badly need your opinion because I’m torn between continuing to fight for our relationship or respecting her decision and letting go. I still love her, but I also don’t want to pressure her if she’s already emotionally checked out. I just want to hear from people who’ve experienced something similar.

Context:
My girlfriend and I were together for 1 year and 4 months. She broke up with me on June 22, just a few hours before my birthday.

That same night, nagjoyride ako papunta work nya sa Alorica, from around 9 PM until almost 12 AM, I waited outside because I wanted to talk to her in person. I begged her not to end our relationship because I genuinely wanted us to fix things.

During that conversation, she admitted that around 3 months ago, she had already started falling out of love. She said unti-unti raw nawala yung spark, and towards the end, parang tropa or classmates na lang kami instead of a couple. Since those months were also our midterms and finals, halos academics na lang talaga yung napag-uusapan namin.

She also told me that whenever she wanted to be affectionate or intimate in public, madalas daw ayaw ko(napag-usapan namin ‘to and I told her na ayaw ko talaga maging intimate sa public) and nag-okay naman sha so I thought okay talaga.

She started working as a BPO agent in May, and sinabi niya nun na ibabalance namin lahat, kasi I reminded her din na may class kami, may work siya, and syempre may responsibility siya sakin and gets niya naman yun.

Pero what confuses me is that around June 6, sinabi pa niya sa’kin na ayaw niyang mag-work kasi natatakot siyang kasi parang anytime makikipag-break daw ako sa kanya. Kaya until ngayon, hindi ko maintindihan kung kailan talaga nagbago yung feelings niya, or if matagal na pala niyang kinikimkim yun.

After almost a week, I reached out to her again because I realized I still wanted to fight for us. I told her I still love her, that I don’t want to give up, and I asked if she’d be willing to give us another chance.

During that conversation, she also told me that after almost a week na hiwalay kami, narealize niyang parang nakahinga siya. She said she no longer had to think about relationship responsibilities like constantly updating me, and mas magaan daw yung pakiramdam niya.

Hindi ko siya masisisi if that’s genuinely how she feels, pero sobrang sakit lang marinig kasi I never wanted our relationship to feel like a burden.

When I asked her if there was still a chance for us, ang sabi niya lang,

“I don’t know. I’m not in the right headspace.”

Now I’m honestly so conflicted.

Part of me wants to respect her space because I know I can’t force someone to love me. But another part of me still wants to fight for us because I genuinely believe what we had was worth fighting for. Natatakot lang ako na baka yung persistence ko maging pressure na para sa kanya.

Questions:

Has anyone here experienced something similar?
If your partner admitted they had fallen out of love months before the breakup, did you ever find your way back to each other?
When someone says, “I’m not in the right headspace,” do you usually take that as needing time, or as a gentle way of saying it’s over?
If you were in my situation, would you keep hoping or start letting go?

I’m open to honest advice, even if it’s something I don’t want to hear. I just want to understand my situation better and learn from people who’ve gone through something similar.
Thank you poooo!