u/ksccc09

Ive had my two cats boy and girl for almost 10 years (since I was 7) after they were left in a box in front of my house one day to which we ended up keeping them as our first pets. These cats literally grew with me and have helped me through my entire life.

Last week while I was home alone, I was outside in my front yard smoking in the broken down car in my driveway. I let my two dogs stay inside because they always do and I didn't think there would be any problem as the back door was open so they could go in and out. While I was outside, I heard my big dog who is a pitbull barking repeatedly. I stupidly left it thinking he was barking at the fence because raccoons get stuck in there sometimes which I can't do anything about. The barking went on and off and I forgot about it.

About an hour later I went back inside to grab a snack when I heard crazy crazy barking and saw that the door that blocks the downstairs from upstairs was wide open. I ran up to the room and it was so messy, everything was thrown on the ground and just a mess and It smelled so bad. I heard my girl cat hissing a bunch so I was just grabbing my big dogs collar trying to get him downstairs. I was pulling him and then turned around and saw my boy cat laying down on the bed covered in blood, split open. I screamed and turned back around to get my dog the fuck out of there and that's when I saw the blood everywhere on the walls.

Once I finally pulled him out I closed the door and went out front into the street screaming for help. Nobody came out so I went in the house as far as I could without throwing up looking for my phone which I never found, so I went back out screaming until somebody came out to help me and let me use their phone (to call my parents.) this whole time all I could think is my best friend is dead and my other best friend could be torn up to shreds for all I know.

An hour later my mom got home and confirmed my boy cat was dead, my girl cat was okay besides multiple patches of hair gone and a huge abscess from an infected bite which she was taken to the vet for.

I feel so so so so guilty. He was the sweetest cat ever and one of the only beings I knew would always love me. And it's so hard because my dog is so sweet too, but all I can think is that he killed me cat. I know "dogs hate cats" but we've had them both together for 4 years- this has never been a thought. I feel so bad for my girl cat who has never been alone. She's had her brother for her whole life and now has watched him die and had to adjust to being alone and is so scared of everything. I don't know what to do. I already have had so much going on in my life and this has added so much more. I'm so sad and devastated

This is going to be really long and probably kinda messy because I'm still processing what even is going on and just don't know what to do. I apologize in advance but thank you for anyone who takes the time to read.

I don't know where to start or what should/shouldn't be said, so I'm just gonna start from the beginning. I (16f) got my first job in December of 2024 (when I was 14 almost 15) where I worked at a children's center. It's a small, tight-knit facility, so there was only ever around 8 employees and 2-3 people working at a time. I got along really well with everybody I worked with, including the manager who I gained a strong bond with (in a mother figure sort of way- my mom works a lot making it hard for her to be here for things.) Due to the structure of the facility, it was really hard to receive hours. During the weekdays there would only be two people scheduled to work one on one for the entire day while dealing with 40+ kids- it was a lot, especially with the fact they were only hiring minors (like myself) and young adults that weren't trained for the position.

Fast forward 9 months into working here, I start getting scheduled a LOT with one of my managers in particular (21m), and we ended up creating what felt like a strong bond and friendship. What I realize now, is that this was the start to his grooming process on me- which in the end was successful (on his end). That same month, he had started texting me whenever he was at work to say little things basically implying that I was the only one he enjoyed working with and that he wished I was older so that we could be "friends." I fell into it because of how much I've been struggling mentally, particularly with having no social life outside of work. He knew about my struggles and took advantage of it. There's many reasons why I let myself see outside of what was really going on despite knowing in the back of my mind what was happening, but this post isn't really to justify myself in that way so I won't keep going.

This all went on over the span of 10 months. During that time period, he first started asking me to buy alcohol for him from my plug to give him outside of work and that he would pay me back. His reasoning was that the shops were too expensive and him being so nice/giving me the attention I had been needing and wanting caused me to say yes. That turned into hanging out at night in obscure places and making out/doing basically everything besides sex. He would always ask me if we could have sex/if I wanted to and I would say no. I didn't want to regret it and wanted to save it for the right time and he would tell me he understood, but add little things like that I hate him because I won't have sex with him. We eventually ended up having sex and it hurt so bad. It continued for 4-5 months. He would get off at the adrenaline he got having sex with me at work in the back while on the clock. He would always tell me that I could never tell anyone because I would ruin his life. There were times he would cut things off and I would get sad, feeling like I did something wrong- but then when I were to cut it off, I would just wanna crawl into a hole and never come out from the feeling of missing that attention he gave me. He was so good at manipulating and taking advantage of my feelings that even after figuring out the situation I'd got into and being aware, I still couldn't stop.

Last month, we were working together and per usual, he was telling me everything wrong I was doing and that I need to hurry up and get my job done. I snapped and it turned into a huge argument. I was crying and he was screaming at me and told me that I needed to go home and that he wasn't going to sit there and baby me even though he was the one making me cry. I realized I couldn't keep it going anymore and texted my manager that I needed to talk to her which resulted in me quitting my job because they essentially didn't care and the retaliation ended up on me. There is now multiple police reports filed and a whole investigation underway that he definitely knows about because the officer we reported it to made sure his university and second job were called so that he would removed from both. I've gone in for two forensic interviews and they have all of my texts with him downloaded, so it's kind of just a matter of when they finish going through all the evidence.

I just am scared of what is going to happen. I feel guilty and don't know what to do. They obviously have access to all of the texts and photos sent, which is good. But I can't help but feel bad because half of the time this went on, it was wanted by me and I played into it. I knew it was wrong and never wanted to do it in the first place, especially not have sex. But I still enjoyed it a lot of times and having him to talk to. I played into it a lot and feel like a dumb bitch for ruining his life and the thought of having to testify or go face to face to talk about everything in detail makes me sick, I just need advice or input or something.