u/leni710

I'm trying to decide if it's just anecdotal or if most of you deal with this (or have done this before): when calling attention to a red flag of a male partner to your mom/sister/cousin/friend who in turn become extremely combative and/or defensive.

It might not even be something super huge just a "hey, I heard you say this thing that you said your man said, it sounds X and I want to check in and address it." (You know, cus we have complicated conversations as adults with people we care about.)

And then comes the flurry of breathless defense (or hanging up the phone to avoid a complicated conversation).

It makes me think about how interesting it is to be in a conversation that, one can assume, would be potentially complex but more engaging if the topic was anyone else ("hey, you said boss/friend/sibliny said something and it sounded like X, can we talk about it") but that as soon as it revolves around a man, the woman gets defensive.

I've decentered men for years and years, so I have literally no energy to "stand by your man, and let the world know that you love him" by defending his honor, or whatever. I also don't have a man hahaha.

It kinda makes me sad to think how many conversations I've had with women over my many years where I ask them about problematic things and their response is to defend the guy. I'm not even sure men do that for their women.

Alright, kids, we have a contested Judge of the Circuit Court, 21st District, Position 3. How exciting!

Remember what we learned in the last decade: judges at all levels are important. The local ones might be elevated to statewide and eventually federal judgeships. We can (hopefully) do this well!

(Let's NOT vote for Mike Flinn, though.)

Anyways, good luck! And even more good luck figuring out who is the least worst in all the other races.

ETA: I can't give much context, but let's just say ill prepared and disregard toward certain clients and cases has been the experience with Flinn. Additionally, I find it quite telling that as a former DDA in 3 counties plus other extensive background, the only endorsement in the actual Ballot Book is from Benton Democrats. No other former or current ally endorsed him. And endorsements are not super challenging to get, either. His fan base wants me to believe that an attorney of his caliber can't get a few extra endorsements to list out so we all know who holds him in high regard?

People also need to understand that no matter who the judge, they go through training and have Bar books to learn about various cases. What you can't teach, though, is caring about vulnerable people and actually doing your job.