Another questioner
I'm like, 98% sure I'm a lesbian. I'm married to a man (for almost 9 years) whom I love dearly. We've had a fulfilling sexual relationship but I've always been lacking some emotional intimacy/depth. I've been trying to find the root cause of this for years like a dog with a bone. My husband is a very sweet man but depressed and so I for many years thought his depression was keeping us apart. He is finally on meds that are working and....I don't know if that was the problem. We have two young kids together so I'm not trying to race out the door. I'm just trying to focus on myself right now.
We've had an open marriage before (before kids) and I think I thought that I would be fulfilled enough in motherhood to not miss/want a girlfriend. I had a pretty serious girlfriend in covid who lived with us. At the time, she wanted to be our third and my husband really didn't get along with her well so it caused a lot of tension and I think for me covered up the fact that things with her felt....different. Easy? I don't even know how to explain it. Anyway, I've realized I really really miss connecting with a woman in a romantic/sexual context so I've been given the green light to put out feelers. I don't know what I'm doing and all I do all the time is basically get horny about women and giggle and then feel guilty. What am I doing? Am I crazy here? Am I just bisexual and trying to run away from my relationship because it's been in a hard spot for a year? Ugh, help!