u/mela_mouse

I have ASD Level 1, so I'm relatively low support needs. That said, the combo of my autism and ADHD results in a lot of executive dysfunction. I'm able to take care of myself and do household tasks, but it's like living life on hard mode. It's like I was born with way less common sense than your average person. And my mind drifts halfway through a task. Constant mistakes: doing laundry, but overloading the machine so it breaks. Doing dishes, but ripping my gloves with a fork prong. Sweeping, but struggling to hold the broom properly and doing a terrible job. Making a birthday cake and ruining it with an embarrassingly messy attempt at decoration. I can drive, but it's so overwhelming that I'm wiped out for days afterward, with stress through the roof. My spouse is a huge, huge support, but I'm so hard on myself for all my little failures. It feels like I'm less of an adult than my peers. Wondering if anyone can relate, and has tips for being easier on oneself-- or even just tips on workarounds to make tasks easier

Just wanted to say hi and that I'm so grateful that this sub exists. I just found it today, after hitting my limit of what I could stomach in the main subs. I'm so sick of how autism (and ADHD) is portrayed over there, as well as on social media... it's portrayed like some quirky personality trait.

For context, I'm a woman who was dx'd in my twenties. Several pediatricians and teachers tried to have me dx'd in early childhood, but my parents never took me for assessment bc they didn't want the stigma of a formal dx. I was academically gifted, but had significant social, emotional, and sensory regulation difficulties. For example, I was selectively mute in early elementary school. Explosive meltdowns at home after school. Eventually began masking my traits, without tremendous success, LOL. I finally took myself to be dx'd as an adult, to get clarity, closure, and support, but was horrified by what I discovered in the "autistic communities" that seem to be mainstream these days...

I see a similar dynamic popping up in EDS communities, which include a ton of self-diagnosed folks. I have hEDS (diagnosed by a geneticist)... and almost every time I see a new doctor, I need to prove my diagnosis to them with my formal diagnostic letter thanks to all the self-diagnosed people from TikTok muddying the waters :(

I'm glad to see that sanity reigns here, though! :)