u/midorinox

This might be more of a rant than anything but i'll try to keep it short!

I (F24) played viola for a few years in middle school, but had to quit before I could really go anywhere with it. About 3 years ago I decided to pick it back up again now that I'm able to dedicate the time to it. I knew as an adult beginner I wouldn't have the typical experience with auditions, conservatories, orchestras, etc. My instructor is amazing though and I'm happy with the progress I've made!! I've found a lot of the information here helpful as well :)

I've been playing on a $200 "instrument" though, it was all I could afford at the time and really just wanted to get my foot through the door (We literally have zero string shops where I live, so nowhere I could walk in and trial good quality violas. It was that one or nothing).

Recently I finally upgraded to a proper student viola because the terrible sound/craft/everything quality was starting to make it unplayable. And I was excited to even rent a $2,000 instrument online to last me the next few years but now i kind of feel dread and anxiety lol. I get that's not a lot of money in this hobby but it's a lot of money for someone from my financial background and it's daunting. I mean, after 3 years I'm only now getting to the end of Suzuki 1 and I can't say with certainty there's a single song I can play confidently, without messing up. I don't know any classical repertoire either.

It just sort of feels like I haven't "earned" this yet? I would even hesitate to go into a shop and try out violas for fear of how clumsy I sound right now. The thought of upgrading again in a few years terrifies me, as I'd be going into a price range where you really do need to trial and play the instruments before renting one. I have no intention of trying to make a career out of this, maybe something amateur or volunteer, but I know I'm well past the cutoff for professional, so I don't know why I care so much!

In other words..... how do I get over myself and just commit to practicing with the damn thing?! I don't want my own anxieties to get in the way of making progress with a better instrument.

Asking on behalf of my mother not myself. So apologies y'all, I don't know much about these medications!!

She's been on zepbound for nearly two years, taking 12.5 at this point, for weight loss. It got rid of her cravings and "food noise" but also her ENTIRE appetite. I tried to find some similar experiences on this sub (I didn't want to ask for advice if there was already an answer out there already) but a lot of people say their appetite levels out and comes back eventually, hers hasnt. Is this supposed to be happening? Is it a dosage issue?

My mom is lucky if she eats a cup of yogurt in a day. Nothing sounds good to her and if it does on the rare occasion, it never tastes good. My whole family has been concerned, but since starting zepbound absolutely nothing tastes good to her. I saw some posts on this sub recommending small, frequent meals or scheduled eating/forcing yourself to eat but if she tries to force herself to eat, she will gag after two or three bites. It wasn't this way before the medication.

It really feels like it's giving her severe food aversion/unhealthy relationship with food instead of helping her relationship with food (getting rid of food noise) so she loses weight healthily!! Has anyone been in a similar position before? Or any advice on how to make her appetite come back on this medication?

I don't want it to sound like im demonizing these medications either, they clearly have been life saving for many people. Just having a hard time understanding why it's had such a severe effect on my mom and how we can fix that! we're at a loss.