u/mindyabus1ness

I get it, it’s a big jump from highschool and it’s what’s you make of it. but what’s with all the fear mongering?

I’m genuinely so confused. I’ve done it all. Unplugged my router, my xbox, cleared the mac address, manually put in ip, subnet and gateway settings, manually put in dns, tested the nay type, restarted my xbox God knows how many times and did a hard reset. I even put in the 8.8.8.8 & 8.8.4.4 for the dns. Then I thought it was a password issue and renived my account thinking that I could add it back without the wifi working. I learned the hard way that I can not. I have 2 other accounts on there but I can’t add my main account back. Is there anything else I can do??

Sorry, I know this is a long post, but I'm not sure if I really am a maladaptive daydreamer. Either way, I really need some advice from people who understand the issues I'm having.

Ever since I was a child I would daydream about anything. I remember being about 5-6 years old when I was daydreaming about a tv show I loved. I would always insert myself into the story and I would walk back and forth daydreaming until I got dizzy. Even then, I remember pushing through sometimes. I was bullied all throughout elementary school, so I'm sure that played a part.

I discovered fanfiction when I was about 12, so I'm sure you can all imagine how that went. I truly did not want to admit it, but I am very addicted to fanfiction and daydreaming. Even when I was getting therapy for other issues, I hid it from my therapist and psychiatrist. I honestly think I need to go back or seek some help but theres no way in hell I'm telling my parents the reason for my behaviour is because of stories I make up in my head. At any minor inconvenience, I start to daydream or read fanfiction. I constantly lay in my bed cocooned in my blanket reading and daydreaming because it feels safe to me, and my daydreaming has gotten out of hand to the point where I have become lazy.

I just graduated highschool, so I'll use a couple recent examples. If I had a test to study for homework or anything important to do my mind would always drift off and I would start to daydream for hours. I will still get the work done, but it was like odd glimpses of a clear mind if you know what I mean. I did graduate with honours and a few certificates, but I truly don't know how I achieved that.

I'm a very imaginative person. I have many goals, aspirations and dreams I want to fulfill. The problem is that when I try to fulfill them, I end up daydreaming about the future instead of what I actually need to do.

For example, I really want to get my driver's licence. I have all the resources I need, but instead of studying, I'll spend hours imagining myself having my licence and driving. My parents constantly have to remind me about things like scholarships, orientation, and other responsibilities. I forget because I'm so absorbed in my own head. I feel awful because I know they shouldn't have to keep chasing me to do things.

I don't necessarily want to give up fiction completely. I actually write fanfiction myself, and writing can sometimes help me process my thoughts. I just want to be able to enjoy fiction without feeling like I need it to escape from everything.

For anyone who struggles with daydreaming, what helped you?

Would setting aside, 30–60 minutes a day specifically for fanfiction/daydreaming be a good starting point? Is it better to gradually reduce it rather than trying to stop completely? And how do you deal with the urge to escape whenever you're anxious or have something important to do? And are there any good resources I can use to help me?

I really want to change. I don't think I'm incapable of it. I've just gotten extremely used to escaping whenever real life becomes uncomfortable. I just don't know how to break that cycle.